The Last Hope

24

Selina.

A shiver runs through me, pulling me out of my sleep into which I've sunk without realizing, my eyelids flutter, and I rub my cheek against my warm and firm pillow. Warm and firm? I tense up, holding my breath, and force myself to open my eyes, which I lift to meet dark blue eyes. "Finished drooling on my arm?" Nikolaï asks with a slight smile.

I sit up at lightning speed, rubbing my chin and furrowing my brows, feeling nothing there,"not funny," I grumble, shooting him a dark look, which only makes him smile wider. It's only then that I realize we're alone in the vehicle, Roman, who was sitting to my left, has disappeared, as well as Grigori and the other man named Lorenzo.

"Where are we?" I ask, squinting to see outside, but it's pitch black, "the place Abbiati mentioned. My brothers went to make sure there's no danger," he replies, his hand still holding mine. He hasn't let go since we got off the plane,"why? Is this Abbiati our enemy?" I ask, struggling to understand their relationship. Nikolaï freezes, looking at me for a few seconds before gently shaking his head.

"No, he's not our enemy. He works with the enemy, but he isn't one himself. He's a very close friend of Elif. Elif's brother saved his and his cousin's life when they were younger. He'll never betray Elif, and by extension, us," he explains, his blue eyes scanning the outside of the car.

"I didn't know Elif had a brother?" I ask, confused, we hadn't known each other for long, but she hadn't mentioned him once, Nikolaï's face closes off, and his grip tightens around my hand, "he died seventeen years ago," he replies, his gaze still fixed on the darkness outside.

"Oh my God, that must have been awful for Elif," I say, feeling sad for the woman who welcomed us with open arms without hesitation despite the dangers we brought into her family, "more than awful. Their mother died when Tarik was six; Elif raised him. He was her baby brother," he says, plunging his now dark eyes back into mine.

I inhale slowly, trying to dispel the tightening grip around my throat, looking away to hide my teary eyes, but his warm palm against my cheek prevents it, his thumb tracing my cheekbone and moving up to under my eye.
"Dark circles appear when you're stressed," he says softly,"I've always had dark circles," I say, smiling, but he shakes his head, "no, the circles disappeared since you arrived," and I realize he's right; I hadn't looked this good in years.

Nikolaï's door opens, making me jump, and Roman appears, "it's good, the place is secure," he says, pointing to the darkness behind him, presumably where we'll spend the night, "but it's small and... basic," he adds, grimacing, his hesitant gaze landing on me."A roof will be more than enough for me," I say, trying to smile at him as Nikolaï gets out, offering me his hand to help.

"I said basic, not dilapidated," Roman chuckles, draping a blanket over my shoulders, "it's chilly in the mountains," he adds, stepping back and disappearing into the trees as I wrap the soft material around me, feeling an unusual warmth in my chest at his gesture, the fact that he thought of me when I'm not even used to taking care of myself anymore.
"He likes you, despite his childish demeanor, he doesn't trust people easily. But it seems like you have a talent for attracting people, Miss Floros," Nikolaï says, wrapping his arm around my waist, I smile softly and follow him into the darkness of the forest, where the scent of pine and earth welcomes us, a scent I've missed for many years. After several minutes of walking in the darkness, during which I almost stumbled a dozen times if Nikolaï hadn't been holding me, we finally arrive in front of a small cabin, its porch lightly illuminated.

"And here's our hotel for the night," Roman says, opening the door with an exaggerated nod of his head, I thank him and enter, closely followed by Nikolaï, close enough that he almost bump into me when I suddenly stop to avoid Grigori, who's carrying many blankets, blocking his view. He lays them on a large mattress on the floor, and my eyes slide to the sofa bed against the wall next to the mattress, "are we sleeping on the floor?" I ask, lifting my face to Nikolaï, who looks around the room, furrowing his brows.

"Stop making that face, moy brat, there's a small room next door with a cozy bed and its own little bathroom," said Grigori, sitting on the couche and starting to take off his shoes, I wouldn't admit it out loud, but a wave of relief washes over me, sleeping in the same room with four men isn't an idea that thrills me.

I feel Nikolaï relax behind me and gently push me forward, I let him, and he opens the door to our right, revealing a room with a single bed and a shower and sink directly open to the room,"you'll have to make do with this, Solnychko," says Nikolaï, walking towards the only window to make sure it's closed before turning back.
"It's more than enough," I say, sitting on the edge of the bed and loosening my brace, which has become painful since this morning, he kneels in front of me and helps me take it off, then gently massages my palm, being careful not to touch my fingers.

"Is it painful?" "It's bearable," I breathe, looking at his face, his features becoming apparent as he furrows his brows, concentrating on his task, his lips pressed together as if holding back words, words that could impact both of us. "Are your painkillers working?" he asks, raising his eyes to meet mine, and I freeze as usual, feeling my face heat up and opening and closing my mouth like an idiot, my mouth where his eyes stop.

I see him take a deep breath, his thumb suddenly against my lips, cutting off my breath, "Selina," he murmurs, leaning his face towards mine, "so beautiful and so strong," he says, his nose trailing along my cheek, his lips planting light kisses along my jaw, making me shiver. I close my eyes, my hand gripping his shirt as my whole body trembles, "I'm not strong," I say, feeling more vulnerable than ever, "I'm afraid, so afraid."

He leans back, locking his gaze with mine, pushing back the strands that have escaped from my braid, "I'll tell you a phrase a great woman once told me," he says, analyzing my face, "fear is not a bad thing, as long as it doesn't control us," he says with a slight smile."Elif?" I ask, recognizing the strong woman she is through his words, and Nikolaï confirms it by nodding. "Wise words," I say, raising a trembling hand to his face and I place my fingers against his jaw, slightly darkened by his stubble, for the first time.

He closes his eyes, turning his face to kiss the tips of my fingers, and I press my lips together to prevent any noise from escaping, but the sensation is too strong, "Nikolaï," I say in a voice I don't recognize, trembling, breathless. He doesn't say anything but slowly grasps my wrist and presses my palm against his cheek, his lips kissing the inside of my wrist.

"Nikolaï," Roman's voice suddenly resonates from the other room, bringing us back to reality, I suddenly pull back, gasping, clutching my hand to my chest as Nikolaï doesn't move, keeping his eyes closed, his fists clenched pressed against the mattress on either side of my thighs. He straightens up, inhaling deeply, pushing his hands into his pockets, "your painkillers?" he asks, his voice much deeper, "in my purse," I reply, straightening up. He nods and leaves the room, closing the door behind him, leaving me alone with the storm raging inside my body.

Nikolaï

I cover Selina's sleeping body with an extra blanket that I waited until she fell asleep to bring, not trusting myself. I clench my fist at the memory of her full lips against my fingers, I growl, rubbing my face and leave the room, trying to chase away the numerous images that appear in my mind. I take off my jacket and approach the mattress on the floor where I'll spend the night since Grigori has claimed the couch, already lying on it. I furrow my brows seeing Abbiati already lying on one side of the mattress with his eyes closed, "already asleep ?" I ask, taking off my shoes. "Hmm," he grunts without moving.

I glance around, looking for Roman, "has Roman already left?", "yes, you'll take his place in two hours, so rest," said my brother, pulling the blanket, already halfway asleep. I sigh and lie down, trying to relax, but it's impossible feeling the stiffness of the statue beside me. "Don't you want to sleep?" I ask, giving him a dark look, and he returns a bored look, it's not the first time we've found ourselves in this situation; we've already had to sleep in a car, in a tent, or even under the open sky during certain missions we've carried out. Lorenzo is much closer to our family than some of our men, and we've even offered him to join us several times, but he said his loyalty already belongs to someone, someone who is totally unknown to us because we all know he doesn't really belong to the Italians.

I sigh, holding back from pulling out my gun to shoot him just to see any expression on his face, "I advise you to fall asleep as quickly as possible, my friend," I say, turning my back on him, ignoring his questioning gaze. But after several minutes, neither of us has fallen asleep, which is going to be very problematic, and indeed, the floor and walls suddenly tremble at the sounds emanating from my brother's mouth, I feel Abbiati sit up abruptly behind me, "What the fuc...?", "I warned you," I growl, covering my head with my pillow, fuck it.