Pretend It's Okay

1 - The Dinner

As she ran around the kitchen with two onions in her hands, Jade wondered why she was bothering to cook. It wasn't a secret that she wasn't a particularly good cook. Box packets and ready made stocks were her go to. There's nothing wrong with that, Jade knew that she was a pretty good baker, but the girls wouldn't be satisfied with just desserts.

Perrie was hugely into savoury food, definitely more so than sweets, whereas Leigh-Anne had always been a bit of a health nut. Jade never knew exactly why Leigh-Anne was like that, she used to make fast food pizzas after all, but the thought of asking had never crossed her mind.

Last month Leigh-Anne had made them all a delicious chicken curry that had Perrie going in for a second helping. It was easily the best thing Jade had eaten all month.

At their previous dinner Perrie had made them a lasagne, buying garlic bread as she couldn't be bothered to make her own. It all took a lot of time and love and Jade felt compelled to put in some more effort this time. She couldn't just pay for a take away every time she was hosting their dinners.

Monthly dinners were a constant in all of their lives. No matter how busy they all were, how hectic work was, they always met on the last Friday of the month for a peaceful meal and a catch up.

They rotated who was hosting and no one else was allowed to be home at the time, other than the twins of course. Sometimes Andre took them out but Jade and Perrie loved seeing them, so more often than not they played with the twins until they went to bed.

Any news that was too big to convey in a text message or phone call was saved for these dinners. Leigh-Anne finishing her album, Perrie working with Ed Sheeran, Jade getting into the studio were all celebrated with lots of wine and excited laughter.

Of course not all news was good. When Jade and Jordan broke up she turned up at Perrie's in sweats, hair greasy from not being washed for a while. Perrie instantly noticed the slighter frame when they embraced, knowing what it meant. Jade didn't eat when she was stressed, so combined with her appearance they were both worried.

All celebrations were forgotten and they spent the night drinking too much, letting Jade open up when she was relaxed enough to do so. It had been coming for a while so she wasn't surprised, but at the same time when they actually said the outcome aloud it felt like a punch in the gut.

That was just over a year ago now though and Jade was pretty much over it. Hearing his name sometimes made her a bit upset, missing the good times they spent together, the two of them locked away from the rest of the world. It would always hurt a little but Jade didn't let it define her.

Once the spaghetti was cooking she headed to her bedroom to get ready. They never dressed up for each other, but Jade at least wanted to put on some clean clothes knowing that she would be hugging both girls a lot and didn't want to smell.

A knock on the door startled Mimi from her sleep, and Jade followed the sound of her scrabbling feet to the front door.

"Jade!" Leigh squealed, stepping forward to wrap the brunette in a tight hug. Of course Leigh-Anne arrived first, Jade thought, chuckling to herself.

"Hi Leigh. Come in, it's fucking freezing out there." Jade said, letting Leigh inside and closed the door behind her. Leigh-Anne was wearing some tight, white jeans and a flowery top, looking effortlessly beautiful without a single drop of makeup.

"How've you been?" Leigh asked, walking to the front room with Jade. Her flat was very big and all of them knew their way around by now. Jade wasn't good at letting anything go, including her London flat with the amazing view.

"Good, yeah. I've mainly been writing, Kamille sent a couple of clients my way." Jade explained. Whilst she was working on her solo career Jade had taken a slower approach than the other two. Writing had always been her favourite thing so she was focusing more on that than getting back on stage.