Always the Bridesmaid, Never the Bride

First Date

As I made my way to the front of the of the restaurant I was careful not to break a leg or something as I hadn't walked in heels this shape in almost a year. I was wearing some seriously strangely shaped shoes as I glanced over at my legs, what an impression for a first date! My heels were clanking loudly on the hardwood floors as I quickly moved up in line.

As we moved up in our long line I felt my heart rate speed up, and I didn't know why. As we approached the check in line, I quickly glanced up at the tables.

Omgosh no, it can't be. Absolutely not today, please! Quickly I broke out in a full blown panic as I saw my sister Emma's ex boyfriend, Charlie sitting with another girl. Flashbacks fled my mind as I thought of my sister crying on the staircase to our balcony for over 2 hours. Anger welled up inside of me until I realized what I did to him. I took a deep breath as I felt my face turn red and my stomach churn. Jack glanced over at me in utter worry, come on Megan think of something!

"Hey Jack, I need to ummmm...powder my nose..." Powder my nose? Who the heck still says that? "Uh, yeah go ahead...." He motioned towards the bathroom as I quickly bolted out,giving only one quick glance to Charlie.

As I moved towards our table which happened to be back to back with Charlie, I quickly sat against the booth, on the side where they wouldn't be able to see my face. Jack glanced up from his menu and beamed at me. "So, what looks good?" "I don't know I've never eaten here...can you order?"

~*~
As the night went on I began to let my guard down. The meal was spectacular and our conversation never seemed to run dry. There would always be something that would pick us back into a conversation. By the end of the night I didn't know what our status was until he grabbed my hand and we took off in his car.

~*~

"You're so cute!" He exclaimed as I explained why I was in the bathroom earlier. "I can't believe you did that though!"

"I know right! But I was mad, no one messes with my sister!" We both laughed. "Where are we going?" "Out for drinks like I said in the beginning. I keep my word." He added while winking over at me. I giggled and did all those things girls do on the first date, fake smile, twirls hair, laughs at everything. You know the usual.

As we pulled into the parking lot I was shot by the smell of cigars and whisky. I didn't realize how long I'd been sober. Jack grabbed my arm and carefully pulled me through the crowd of drunk dancers. At first we continued our conversation from the car but then we dug into more personal things. As the night dragged on and the drinks rolled in I felt calm, at peace. I don't think I've ever been so free and comfortable with a person ever, especially not on a first date, or whatever this is.

As we made our way to the parking lot, the moment felt right. I unhooked our intwined hands and moved my hands to his shoulders and got up on my toes. (Because I know that even with heels on he's way too tall for me.)He carefully placed his arms on my hips and leaned in. It was perfect. Everything about the moment was perfect.

Until the moment was over. As we pulled away from each other I looked deeply into his eyes. His light hazel eyes, that were shinning in the moonlight and sparkling with the broken glass bottles on the floor. I studied him and for that moment we didn't know what to do.

"So um...lets go...." He awkwardly stated, he shoved his hands into his pocket and walked over to the car.

The whole ride home was awkward. Neither one of us believed what just happened and the fact it happened so soon was another thing. I took a few deep breaths and closed my eyes as I figured that I was working my self up. I was about to have an anxiety attack. I guess you could say commitment and dating freaked me out and I never knew what to do. And there's only one person to blame for that, Skyler. My younger sister Skyler was always the nosy "what if" sister. She would tell me many things that were probably not true but still highly frightening coming from someone you thought of as a friend. All throughout my life she was like that annoying voice in your head that tells you all the possible things that may happen. So at that moment I imagined it all. Us breaking up and work collapsing. The whole thing. Luckily I was almost home so that meant this night was over. I tried again to calm myself down.

As the car pulled to my apartment, I lightly kissed him on the cheek and thanked him for an amazing night. It was funny to see him all awkward and shaken up but I wished he wouldn't make it worse by not talking. All we did was kiss! As I waved good bye to Jack I felt happy. Content, excited, elated, whatever else you call pure joy/ excitement. I haven't felt that way with a guy in a long time, we could talk for hours and never get bored. Although my mind was still spinning I knew one thing was for sure. I could not let this one get away.

Another update! I was just reading the story and I realized how boring it was and how we haven't gotten anywhere! So I wanted to update again.