More Than This

12 - Matt

Guess what?! MTT just took the silver award for the TEEN FIC awards - romance!!!

Song of the chapter - Fell on Black Days by Soundgarden

Tuesday showed up way too soon. The long weekend without my dad had been pretty relaxing. Having Pete back was also a good thing, although I didn't hang out with him over the weekend. After he left on Friday, we did our own thing.

I felt okay after my talk with Amber. It had gone about the way I expected, so my ego was still in tacked. But of course I wished things had been different. Whatever, it was done, I didn't have any more ideas about trying to be with her. I needed to just fucking get over it.

The weekend without the crew, or my dad, gave me the chance to hang out with my brother. Mark was still a decent kid, he hadn't been messed up by high school shit yet. Plus he hated my dad too, so we had that in common. That was about it, though. Mark was more like mom, both in looks and personality. He seemed to let more roll off his back than I did. He had the darker hair and brown eyes like mom. It was actually nice not to have to look at another clone of my dad.

"Hey, Mark, wanna play?" I asked him as I leaned my head into his room. His eyes got all wide like it was a big deal.

Actually I'm not sure when the last time I invited him to play was, so maybe it was a pretty big deal.

"Yeah, sure!" He said while jumping off of his bed. He left whatever he had been working on strewn all across the covers and followed me into my room. I even let him use my gaming chair.

"So what do you want to play?" I gave him the options.

He just shrugged, "whatever's already in there."

It was still the game Pete and I had played, spending most of Friday morning hunting down zombies. "You got it, kid."

After a while of gaming, I asked him something I'd been wondering. "Mark..."

"Huh?"

"What do you think of dad?" I had started to worry more about Mark, ever since I saw what an ass I had become. He was still young enough to avoid that shit.

"I don't know. Angry a lot I guess." He shrugged.

"What does he say to you?" I wasn't around as much anymore, so I wondered how bad it had been for him.

"Not that much. But he likes to tell me when I mess something up." He said as he continued to play.

Mostly what I had experienced, and expected. "You know, you shouldn't listen to him when he's like that. He can be a huge asshole, but don't let that mess with your head."

He glanced over at me and shrugged. "Maybe."

"No, not maybe. Trust me, don't let what he says get to you. Everyone messes up, even me." I laughed at the end. Who knew I'd be sitting in my room telling my little brother that I fucked up sometimes. Not me, that's for sure. I had spent pretty much my whole life trying to seem perfect. And you just can't do it.

"Yeah you do!" Mark laughed back.

"What?! How could you say that to me?" I joked. "I'm supposed to be your perfect big bro, the one you look up to and try to be like!"

Mark swallowed hard, suddenly seeming uncomfortable. "Yeah, I guess. I mean I did. Or, um..."

"Hey," I started, putting my hand on his shoulder, "relax, I was joking. I don't really want you to be like me."

He looked up at me, smiling again, "well, not before, but you've been nicer lately so maybe now I could."

I ruffed up his hair, as he tried to escape my assault, "yeah, yeah. Enough with that, let's blow stuff up."