Escaping Elysia

Chapter 32 - A Cold, Wet Thing

Dale

In the solar room, I can feel Evita behind me as we clean the panels and mirrors. The tension between us is an invisible force, pulling us closer together, impossible to ignore. I think about the look she gave me at breakfast and my heart leaps. I want her to come with us.

As we pack the cleaning supplies she seems distracted, throwing everything in in one disorganized pile, never looking up. Back on the ground floor she tucks the supplies away and turns to leave.

I reach out and brush my hand against her hip. "Hang on for a second."

She turns slowly and looks at me, her jaw tight. My palms are sweaty and I wipe them on my pants.

"So, almost there, huh?" I say, stalling.

"Only a few more days."

I shove my hands in my pockets, then take them out again.

She presses her lips together. "Dale, what is it?"

When she says my name my heart speeds up, like I've been sprinting. I can't let her go back to Sanzha. I don't want to go back to Fairbanks without her.

"Come with us," I say.

She balks. "Come with you? I can't." She stares down at her hand then looks back at me, her jaw set. "I don't feel that way about you."

That's a lie. Does she think I don't know her better than that, after all these weeks? Her words are too careful, too guarded. I saw the way she looked at me this morning, and last night. She's just scared.

I take a shaky breath. "Yes you do. You know you do. You can trust me."

She shakes her head. "I wouldn't be welcome. No one would want me there."

"I would want you there."

The muscles in her neck tense, and she looks away. If I'm honest with myself, I knew it would come to this. I should back off now, like I've always done, and give her space. I should let her take her time, and come to me when she's ready. But I'm tired of waiting.

I take a step closer. She doesn't move.

I press one hand to her cheek. She doesn't move. I tuck the other into her hair. It's like warm earth, soft after a summer rain, and I want nothing more than to bury myself in it for hours. She still doesn't move.

My eyes lock with hers, and I lean in.

At the last second she turns her head, and my lips graze her jaw. My heart drops and I imagine it lying on the floor, a cold, wet thing we both pretend not to see.

"I'm sorry," she says, running from the room.

My hands, devoid of her warmth, fall empty to my sides.  

Evita

When I leave the Solar Room I half-run, half-walk to the back of the Solarium, my only thought to get away from what just happened as quickly as possible.

I reach the corner of the Solarium, where water from a fountain affixed to the wall falls down in a straight sheet, splashing onto the rocks below it. One rock, small and smooth, has escaped the pile and is laying alone on the path. I kick it, and it bounces off the wall with a light crack. It lands, not in the pile with the other rocks, but under a low bush, in the shadows.

My chest aches. I can't believe I almost let Dale kiss me. I wanted him to. I can still feel the touch of his lips against my jaw. I never should have let it get to this point.