To Build a Home

Chapter 25

Stiles' cell phone vibrated across his nightstand, hand reaching out on autopilot, head still pressed down into the pillow as he pulled it towards the bed. How he'd fallen asleep last night, he wasn't sure, but he wasn't surprised that every muscle in his body ached, the guilt over what had happened with Isaac yesterday having magnified the pain of having been on his feet all day. The phone buzzed again, this time in his hand.

"Siri, read last text message," he mumbled as he held the 'home' button on his phone down, eyes still closed as he turned so that only one side of his head was against the cotton of the pillowcase.

"You have a message from Derek: Had to run to Newport to grab paperwork," she read, voice computer-like. "Getting bagels on the way home. Sorry if I woke you."

Stiles groaned, not at anything or anyone in particular, just at the fact that it was morning and he felt like he hadn't slept five minutes. He was afraid to open his eyes, knew by the orange glow behind his eyelids that it was at least mid-morning and probably time to get things going. With a yawn he slipped out from beneath the covers, blinking as he tried to adjust to the day.

He yawned again as he listened to the pot of coffee finish in the kitchen, not realizing until his first sip of caffeine that he didn't hear the usual hum of Little Bear on the living room television. Coffee steaming in hand, he shuffled across the tile to the carpet, eyes narrowing questioningly when he realized Isaac wasn't up yet.

x

"Good morning, sleepy head," he smiled as he sat on the edge of Isaac's bed and pushed his blonde curls out of his eyes, suddenly noticing his son's flushed face and rosy cheeks. The toddler whimpered quietly before taking in a wheezy breath that made his father's stomach clench and smile fall.

"I c-called you...'nd Papa b-but...you didn't come," he wheezed, breaths light and quick as he lay tiredly against the bed sheets. "I tookted my...'haler...but it didn't w-work," he whimpered, which caused him to cough. It was then that Stiles noticed Isaac's teal inhaler and attached spacer poking out from beneath the Batman sheets, the guilt of not hearing his son call out for him making his heart heavy and his chest tight.

"Shh, it's okay, baby boy. It's okay," Stiles soothed as he quickly lifted a wheezy and whimpering Isaac from the bed, blue blankie clutched beneath the toddler's fingers as they made their way across the room. "Shh, I'm here now. Daddy's here."

After settling them into the rocking chair and readying the nebulizer, Stiles rested the mask on Isaac's face and let him lean one side of his body against his chest. "Just breathe for me, okay? Nice, deep breaths. Let's get some medicine into those lungs." He could feel Isaac struggling in his arms, mask fogging up with each forced exhale. "That's it, honey," Stiles cooed, rubbing the toddler's back in gentle circles like his mother used to do for him. "Just do your best."

"Where's...Papa?" he asked, looking up with teary eyes as he wheezed on.

"He'll be home any minute, okay? Just breathe for me, baby."

"I...tried," Isaac said, voice barely a whisper, Stiles knowing he was talking about the inhaler and spacer; they'd been letting him do it himself lately in the morning to help him feel more in control. Now, it just made the current situation feel like a slap in the face.

"You did a great job, Ize. I'm sure of it. The medicine probably just wasn't strong enough this time," Stiles tried to smile, but his heart was pounding and sinking and his brain was trying to figure out what to do next.

Because he was the reason his son was gasping for air in his arms; his lack of time management, the tone he used when he told Isaac to be quiet after picking him up from school day after day because he as just so tired and couldn't listen to another word, and the forgetting (which was, at first, just reading glasses and his plan book but had culminated with Isaac's medication the day before) had finally caught up with him. This, the pain his son was going through and the agony it was watching him do so, suddenly became too much. Stiles tried to catch his own breath as the room began to circle and swallow him whole until suddenly it was like he was drowning and he knew, then, that there was no way he was going to make it out of this alone.