Free as a Jailbird

Chapter 2

Not knowing when my next meal will be, I fill my stomach up with Alice's burritos until I almost burst inside. The house is warm and cosy. Alice has already retired to bed with a migraine. I watch Shane kick back on the couch with his body stretched out and his long, straggly hair hanging in his eyes. He has a remote in his hand and is aimlessly flicking through channels.

"How long are you here for, Jess?"

I shrug. "Till tomorrow, I 'spose."

"Mhm. Then what?"

"I dunno. I probably should clear things up with the East crew. Jez was pretty pissed after what happened. He'll want to chat."I add extra emphasis to the last word and roll my eyes. Shane smiles lightly. "I'm not looking forward to it."

"Don't go then."

"Oh, okay, so you'd rather he and his buddies stop by here?" My lightness is obviously fake; it's not like the East crew will ever show up here for just a cup of tea.

He considers it for a moment, but he and I both know that we don't want them coming here.

When I was fifteen years old, I was recruited into a newly formed gang of bikers. One of the founding members – Rusty, they called him – was actually a family friend, so we were on good terms. Anyone else my age would have had to undergo rigorous testing and a probation period of roughly a year until they were accepted. I rode with the Southbend Bikers for a while and before I knew it, I had my own bike. A Bobber,naturally. They were like my second family.

The Southbend Bikers grew quickly, expanding their business and gaining quite the reputation. Back then my city wasn't really known for its biker gangs; the streets were more populated with punk crews and a mix of dealers. We were one of the first, and for a time, that felt good.

Once I became involved in the real crimes and the commitment I made to the gang, I couldn't get out. Torn between my family and my new, rather rebellious family,I ended up leaving home. It wasn't all my decision; my parents were x'ashamed of me, of who I'd become. Well, it was mostly Mom who hated me. Dad was too lazy to care what kind of shit I got into and too involved in his career to notice. Mom never liked me; she idolized my two brothers because they were destined for greatness. Said I was a disgrace. Eventually it was Mom's cynicism that drove me away. I turned my back on my family and rode with the Southbend Bikers.

Somewhere along the lines, one of the members did something bad. Worse than the drugs we dealt. Worse than money laundering. Worse than the heavier crimes I tried to stay away from. We were in a huge mess because of it and the guy ended up in prison for life, somewhere overseas. I never saw him again.

I realized then that I'd made a big mistake. I'd become blind to the life I'd been living and the people in the gang who changed the rules.The Southbend Bikers certainly didn't live up to their name from then on. They turned. They became feared, not respected, and I was in too deep to see it. They turned on their leader, something that goes against out code. I knew I couldn't be involved anymore, so I quit the club.

But it wasn't easy.There were rules about backing down. Rules I wasn't really all that happy about to begin with. And I had to get a lot of inside help to pull myself out. Thankfully I was close with the leader at the time.Alistair Baker, went by the name 'Mercy'. He let me leave. Said I owe him a favor for it.

Those things you can never escape.

And a lot of good that did me. A year later, after I thought I was finally free from them and meandering my way through different street crews, Rusty – my family friend from the Southbend Bikers – found me on a job. It wasn't a happy reunion. In fact, it was probably one of the worst days of my life. Rusty needed my help getting out of a pretty deep mess behind Mercy's back, and because it was dangerous and I'd be in prison for life if we were caught, I refused. We lost each other's trust, he lost more than just his teeth and I lost a friend I would always miss. I knew I'd have to pay for what I did to Rusty.Because he couldn't clean up his own mess, Mercy disowned him. When someone is disowned from a gang as A-list as the Southbend Bikers ... it isn't pretty. I haven't seen or heard from him since. And in away, I was partly to blame.

I avoided the Southbend Bikers' territory completely, tried to start over and ended up meeting Alice. I was at my lowest, and she was my miracle. She let me stay with her for a while and accepted my lifestyle. Under her flexible terms, I lived the life I'm used to and went back to the streets, catching up with old crew members and running free.

The authorities knew who I was soon enough, but in a city this big, there's thousands of other kids like me. Most of them are younger and completely alone. I know of a few, actually. I try to help them out as much as I can. I know what it's like to be lost, after all. But I'm used to it now. I've learnt from my mistakes, I've found my balance and I'm comfortable with the way things are.

Then yesterday happened. I'll have to make amends with the East crew, whom I've been working for these past few months. But that can wait. First, I must attend to those responsible for my arrest last night. I'm just not sure I want to travel down that road again.

"You'll be fine,Jess, you always are." Shane breaks my thought pattern and I lookup from my empty plate.

"Hmm?"

"With the bikies tomorrow," he says, tipping his head back and meeting my gaze. "And please don't let them come here again. The neighbors complained for weeks after twenty bikes showed up and crowded the entire street at six in the morning."

I stand up and put my dishes in the sink, suddenly very eager to get to bed. I haven't been so full in days. "Yeah yeah, I'll try to keep it down."

"Night," he mutters and switches channels.

Before I leave, I find myself caught up in the scene on the television, watching the armed gunmen press their backs up against the wall, listening to the criminals on the other side discuss their next moves. When they round the corner, a few shots are fired, leaving one man scrambling for an exit. But there's no way out. The cops wait for him to beg for his life. When he does, they tell him to shove it and shoot the criminal in cold blood. I wince, knowing it's just a late night show and not reality. But it reminds me of someone.

"Goodnight," I say and head upstairs to the spare bedroom.

As I climb into bed, I think about my stay in prison. Another day in paradise. What's next for me? Will I be there again tomorrow? Is this my routine for the rest of my life until I'm eighty and join the pension program? Or is there something else out there for me, a purpose? Will I ever have a normal life?

Whatever the plan, at least I know one thing for sure: Tomorrow will be one rollercoaster ride I'm definitely not looking forward to.