Y/N has always dreamed of going to Paris and her team at the BAU wanted to help make that dream a reality. The group is more like family than coworkers and so you all decide to take a trip to the city of love together. You were so excited to spend...
You all had now been in Paris for a few days and you couldn't be more content. Your days were spent walking the European streets with your closest friends and your nights were spent snuggling up to the girl you'd been crushing on for months. Ever since y/n joined the BAU you'd harbored a bit of a crush on her, but you were never planning on acting on it. You knew she thought of you more like a brother than a boyfriend and that was something you would need to learn to live with. The other night when she confronted you about the picture you had of her, you knew it was now or never. Luckily she didn't push you off of her in a fit of disgust and she even seems to want to continue this little arrangement, if that's what it should be called?
They hadn't discussed what this is, honestly any time they were alone together things got too hot and heavy to quick to have any conversation even mildly about what they were doing here. To be totally honest, you were just happy to be involved.
Did you have feelings for y/n? of course. But that didn't mean that she had them for you too. You heard her when you arrived in Paris, she thinks it's the city of love. Maybe she's just grasping at straws to find that feeling and I was the closest thing available. Whatever this was, I didn't want it to end.
"Hey, I'm going to get breakfast with Derek are you coming?" y/n asked, walking out of the bathroom in a new outfit. I hadn't seen this one before, it was a powder blue crew neck with a black skirt and tights underneath. Her heeled booties gave her a few inches of height but I still towered above her which I knew she secretly loved.
"I'm not quite ready for the day, you head down and I'll be down in a bit." you told her, leaning over to grab fresh clothes from your suitcase.
She smiled and nodded, coming up to you and giving you a quick kiss on the lips before heading downstairs. You rifle through your bag looking for one specific outfit. Something warmer than yesterday, you know the temperature dropped a little bit. Oh! You should remind y/n to bring a warmer jacket too since she was cold yesterday.
"Ah, here it is." you speak to yourself, letting out a sigh of relief.
You grab a simple pair of black slacks and a striped button up, but you were specifically looking for this thick peacoat-like jacket. Both cozy and stylish, you think it'll help you fit in better with the trendy European guys that line the streets here. It's like being in a GQ magazine for god's sakes.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
You finally get all dressed and begin your descent down into the lobby area where complimentary breakfast is left before 9am. As you leave the elevator you start to search for any sign of y/n or Derek. You scan the room but don't see them so you begin walking around corners where some tables sit. You finally hear Derek laugh and you know you must be close.
"Stop it, Derek! It's not like that!" you hear y/n whine from a close distance.
You finally see them sitting a few tables away and begin to walk towards them. She playfully smacks his shoulder and leans back in her chair.
"What, so you and pretty boy haven't been making kissy face at each other this whole trip?" he asks with a smirk and y/n crosses her arms defensively and sits back up.
I get closer and Derek looks at me, about to speak before y/n speaks again.
"No, ew Derek. We're just friends. I'm not into him" she says and Derek's face suddenly shifts to an oh shit look.
"What's wrong?" y/n asks, spinning her body around to follow his gaze behind her where I stand frozen. No words come out, my mouth open slightly with the whisper of words I planned to say before my world stopped. She is visibly shocked, we all are for that matter.
"Oh my god, no, Spence I-" she starts but I've already turned around and started walking before she can finish. I can hear her and Derek yelling something behind me but it's too late, it's all muffled white noise to me now.
I head back into the elevators and hit the close door button so hard and so many times you'd think it would have broken off. I stand silently in the elevator as the only sounds heard are the small dings of each floor being passed. I finally arrive to my floor and somehow, without knowing how I got there, I am back in my room. My shared room. I see y/n's shoes on the ground and it sends me spiraling once again. I feel tears prick my eyes and I try to fight them off but it's no use. I knew that we weren't dating, at least not yet. But what she said made it seem like the idea was so far fetched, like she's so much better than me and could never even fathom it.
I walk over to the bathroom and run the shower, attempting to drown out the sound of what has become rather loud sobbing.
God, I am such a baby. A girl says she doesn't like me and suddenly I'm crying. Come on, Reid.
I sit for a few moments, trying to gather my thoughts when I hear the front door open and close gently.
"Spence, I know you're in here." she says, a long exasperated sigh leaving her lips.
I stay silent and she walks towards the bathroom door.
"Spence, please. Open the door, I need to explain myself." she pleads. She sounds very close, likely leaning her body against the opposite side of the bathroom door.
You both sit in silence for a moment, the only sounds heard are those of your combined breaths. You finally walk over to the door and begin to push it open. You see y/n back up, her face flustered and her eyes looking at you with a sadness you hadn't seen from her before.
"Spence, I didn't mean anything I said." she starts
"How can you say you didn't mean that? Why would it even cross your mind if it was something you'd never thought about before? Do you know how that made me feel, hearing you say that?" you ask, your voice a lot louder than you intended but your emotions are beginning to get the better of you.
"Please, just - " she tries and you cut her off
"NO" you shout and she jumps, visibly startled by your outburst. You inhale deeply and collect yourself.
"I can't do this. I can't just be there when you wanna fuck and then get thrown aside like I don't matter"
"But I - " she tries again
"Let me speak." you interrupt once again. "I've been thrown to the side too many times, I won't do it again. I wasn't asking for your hand in marriage here but I was asking for a bit of mutual respect and maybe even some shared feelings. I know now that I was wrong to think that this could ever work. We're too different. I want a relationship and you just want to whore around with whoever is available to fill something empty inside you."
She's silent for a moment, looking at you with wide eyes.
"You don't mean that." she says, tears beginning to stream down her face at a steadier pace.
"I do, y/n. So why don't you just call Geoff and fuck him tonight, because I'm over it." you spit and turn around to walk towards the bed.
You know it may have been harsh, but so was what she said. Maybe she will finally understand how she made you feel. You're pulled out of your own thoughts when you hear the door slam shut. She left.
