Inescapable History, Inescapable Fates

Bad Debt Part 5

Henry was mildly concerned. After the fistfight, Alex did not come back. Henry saw him between classes the next day but let him walk by. That evening, he saw Alex leaving campus, aiming for the bus stop, and, on a hunch, decided to follow him.

He texted Pez

Henry

6:45 pm

Spy mission, following Alex, meet at gas station across from bus stop.

Pez arrived, sweating, in a mesh shirt, camo hat, and dark sunglasses.

"Reporting for duty!"

They called an uber and watched what bus Alex got on. Cawthorne bound. When they told the driver to follow it, he readjusted the mirror so he could look at their faces.

"Just tell me it's not about a girl."

"No, it's a boy!" Pez piped up.

The driver arched an eyebrow.

"Not like that!" Henry choked out, "We're his friends, we're worried about him." Henry couldn't think of a better excuse, but once the Uber driver was sure he wasn't involved in a stalking situation, he didn't seem to care. After thirty minutes, Alex got off the bus at a hotel. The doorman let him in. Henry stood outside the hotel, staring at its dozen floors. No way would they be able to figure out what room Alex was going to. Pez was way ahead of him, already striding into the lobby. Henry scrambled to keep up.

"My suite should be prepared, room 1201," Pez told the doorman,

The doorman bulked, "It's already occupied."

"You must be mistaken," Pez replied, all easy confidence, "I talked to the manager on the phone. I assume you have not double booked the room."

"I... will go get my manager," The doorman said, leaving his desk.

As soon as he left, Pez photoed the guest sheet. They sprinted out of the hotel, Pez gave Henry a warm grin and they burst into laughter.

In the Uber back to Sandhurst, they inspected the guest list. Pez circled the name Raphael Luna, "Wasn't he touring the school last week?"

Henry nodded, "Someone in my class talked about it. He's from Mexico."

It was the closest thing they had to a lead.

Mexico.

Alex stayed with Luna for one more night. They skyped Nora and discussed the law and Marxism and what they wished the world would look like. And Alex knew he was wasting his money on books and knowledge when he planned to die in prison.

They study without an end, plan without a pause, rebel without a policy, conserve without a patrimony. They study in the university and the university forces them under, relegates them to the state of those without interests, without credit, without debt that bears interest, that earns credits. They never graduate.

The day after Luna returned to Mexico and Alex returned to the dorm, he went to the library and reread the Moten article with a sharpie. He didn't know why. He didn't know why. But he blacked out half a paragraph. Maybe because it seemed too hopeful for the world. Too dangerous for human eyes.

They're building something in there, something down there. Mutual debt, debt unpayable, debt unbounded, debt unconsolidated, debt to each other in a study group, to others in a nurses' room, to others in a barber shop, to others in a squat, a dump, a woods, a bed, an embrace.

Alex knew the debt Moten described, had lived it. He had spent long nights on Luna's couch or stargazing with Nora, taking out loans. A lifetime of home-cooked meals and smiles. A bound wound, a free plane ticket, a new name and life he hadn't paid for. It was bad debt, unpayable debt, taken out on credit that couldn't go bad.

That night, Alex stared across the room at Henry. Once again they were students, but Henry was also a debtor, and Alex wanted his payment in the way of Graeber, not Moten.

A life plus interest.