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although it's hard to write when you only have been broken up with for 5 hours and you don't know what happened, i can write some things.

"cause it's always one step forward and three steps back" i was just finally getting happy but i guess that's not how i'm meant to live in this world

"i'm the love of your life until I make you mad" i thought he loved me but i guess i messed that up too

"it's always one step forward and three steps back"

"do you love me, want me, hate me? boy, i don't understand. no, i don't understand" i didn't understand the logic. the past few weeks have been mixed signals left and right. so maybe it was my fault.

i was tired. i put my guitar down and turned off my piano before reading the rest of the lyrics i wrote down

and maybe in some masochistic way
i kinda find it all exciting
like, which lover will i get today?
will you walk me to the door or send me home cryin'?

i am so good at writing. i laughed softly and put everything away before going back to my room.

my small new york apartment felt like it was closing in on me. i went into my room and closed the door. i just couldn't do it anymore. it all hurt

"it's brutal out here" i said laying down on my bed. i grabbed my phone and saw a text from nick. i groaned and opened it

nick armstrong
we are still friends right?

kayla tays
huh? really?

nick armstrong
what?

kayla tays
so you can break my heart then
ask to be friends?

nick armstrong
i just can't fully lose you

kayla tays
pls stop contacting me rn.
i will text you when i am ready

nick armstrong
forgot you were bitchy

i groaned and went to instagram to see what was happening over there. i saw jace posted

jace @/jaceysmith

jace @/jaceysmith

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finally mine ;)

→ sapnap @/sapnapinsta
     pretty girl
        → user @/user7
           sir what ab ur gf....

→ karl @/karljacobs
     cool.

→ kay @/kaytays
     ur so hot
          → jace @/jaceysmith
               says you pretty

i laughed at her response before turning my phone off. i screamed into my pillow then started crying again

punz's pov:

i laughed as i saw sapnap karl and kayla's comments under jace's new post. it was kind of funny already.

i noticed it was already 1 am. i had ended the live seconds ago and questioned on what to do. sleeping didn't sound all that fun but there was nothing else to do

netflix it is. before i could turn my tv on i got i discord message from kayla.

weird

oh! group chat with me her and karl. makes more sense now.

kayla tays
hey umm i have a question

punztw
hit me

karl jacobs
i may have an answer if ur lucky

kayla tays
does nick like jace?
i saw his comment and i feel like y'all
might know

punztw
i have no clue. he has acted different
since she came along tho

karl jacobs
i agree on that one

kayla tays
oh ok
thank you guys

karl jacobs
do you want me to call you?

punztw
let me join i am bored

kayla tays
don't let him join

punztw
bitch.

i laughed at her as she called the group chat that the three of us shared. i answered and was met with kayla who was laying on her bed. and karl who was sitting at his desk

"hello punzie" karl said as i set my phone up

"hello karlos" i said. suddenly kayla fell off her bed and we all laughed

"SORRY" she yelled before getting back up on the bed. i smiled and kept playing valorant. karl laughed at her

"hey punzie poo" kayla said

"please just call luke" i said. she smiled

"hey lukey" she said. i laughed

"hey kayla" i said. she just smiled softly.

i went back to my game and paid zero attention to anything else. i heard karl and kayla talking to each other.

kayla's pov:

i made my way into my music room with both of the boys still on call. decided to work more on the song i wrote earlier.

i played my piano quietly making both boys look up at me.

"one step forward and 3 steps back" i sang quietly. i looked up and saw karl smiling.

"karl you should come visit me" i said stopping what i was doing

"make luke visit you, he is closer" he said going back to minecraft

"what?" punz said

"i said you live closer to kay" karl repeated

"oh, yeah i'm 30 minutes out of the city"

"i am directly in the city" i said laughing as i pointed to the window behind me

luke nodded and went back to his game. i decided to play i different song and not worry about the other one.

i sang a random song

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