The Heiress Club

Chapter 20: You

I don't see him until we're back at school. I don't think about him until we're back at school. Then, all of a sudden, I realise that maybe I should've. I don't know what to think now.

I see him at breakfast, cold and beautiful. He looks at me, falters, then looks away. I can't blame him.

I must be delusional. Why would I kiss Jasper, heartbreaker and homewrecker of the school, playboy extraordinaire, the oldest of all old money, someone who has everything I don't? Why, why, why?

"I think I'm going crazy," I tell Seung-jun. He doesn't know. Nobody does.

Seung-jun laughs. "You trying to tell me you weren't already?"

I stumble through the day halfheartedly. My grades are already awful; I doubt this semester will be different. I just can't stop thinking about how stupid I am. What would Sparky say? He'd tell me that I'm getting attached and being dumb. Jasper is the kind of person who doesn't get attached. He dates a girl, drops them, moves on. Kiss and tell. Why can't I move on?

I finally finish the school day and feel like I've just ran a marathon. I haven't seen him all day and yet he lives rent-free in my head. I really need to get a different hobby.

I'm heading down a hallway. It's snowing outside—snow season is nearly over, but winter storms are still going strong. Arbourne has invested heavily in heating systems so it's not even cold inside. The real annoyance is when you have to go outside and sprint towards your dorms. I haven't put my books and papers in my backpack yet, but I really should so they don't get snowed on.

Suddenly, a hand jerks my shoulder around. I barely register that it's Jasper before he slams me against the wall, pinning my body there with his own.

Holy shit, I think.

"What were you playing at?" Jasper demands, his breath harsh in my ear. "New Year's. What the hell was that?"

I'm trying to come up with a response but he's so close and so are his lips and I just can't. My brain stutters and whirs. I try not to think about the way I can feel his chest rise and fall with hitched breaths. I try not to think about his eyes, blue and piercing and beautiful. I try not to think about how we're in a public hallway. On second thought, maybe I should think about that. "What?" I manage.

"You know damn well what you did," he hisses.

"What, kiss you?"

"Why did you do it?" he asks, his voice flat and cold.

I furrow my brows and don't answer. What does he want me to say?

"Did you want to assure that I wouldn't tell others about your dirty little secret? Did you want to be able to tell your friends, I kissed Jasper Rochester? Was it another one of your games, another one of your lies? Were you trying to play me—"

"Play you?" I exclaim, finally finding my voice. I lean forward slightly, moving to push him off, and he jerks away like he's been burned by fire. "Play you? You're Jasper Rochester. You think I could play you?"

"You could do anything, lie about anything—"

"What else is there for me to lie about? How could I play you? Aren't you supposed to be Jasper I-date-a-new-girl-every-two-weeks Rochester? You're insane if you think I was trying to do anything!"

"Then why did you do it?"

I stare at him, stricken. I take a breath to calm down a little. My heart is racing. A little from surprise, a little from his sudden proximity to me. I can still remember the way his hand felt on my back, the way his heartbeat felt. "Is it so strange," I say slowly, "to think that I might have just wanted to kiss you?"