As far as the Sky

Chapter Five

  Now-Addison

Today is another day of school but at my surprise, I'm kind of happy to go, kind of excited about this whole new day. I know this happiness isn't about actually going to school but more about who I go to school with. I know Charlie will sit next to me today, I know he will be as kind as he was yesterday.

And deep down, I hope this will never change. I hope I will say this all my life: this strong and so powerful reason that someone actually seems to care about me.

Or maybe this is just a dream, a distant and unreachable dream. Maybe this is only the fruit of my imagination. Maybe all my life, I will dream of another life and never live it. Or maybe one day, one unforgettable day, I will live this dream. Maybe I'll go up, as far as the sky, maybe one day I will reach this impossible dream of the perfect life.

I let Lara know I will go to school on foot. So, what is my surprise when I see her car stopping in front of me while I'm walking.

"Addison! She calls me.

-What are you doing here, Lara? I told you yesterday I didn't want to go by car.

-Come on, Addie, you will not go to school by foot.

-Not if I continue talking to you", I reply as I keep walking.

Lara moves her car at my speed.

"Lara, how many times do I have to tell you?

-Is this because of yesterday? I didn't mean to...

-Yeah, you did. And no this is not about yesterday, it's about all days. You never considered me as your friend, right?

-Bullshit! Addie, what makes you believe that?

-You! I don't want to go in this car because you're in it, Lara!"

She turns red of anger. She speeds up and leaves me walking all alone in the street.

It doesn't hurt as much as I thought it would. Maybe because I know someone will be here for me, for comforting me. Lara has never been my real friend, but I think she doesn't understand that because she never had a real friend. But how can I be this friend for her if all she does with me is ridiculing myself?

"Hey", I say as I sit next to Charlie.

"Hey, he smiles. How are you?

-Fine. And you?"

Lara is looking at us.

"Oh Charlie, you're so funny!" I say loud enough for her to hear me.

And I fake a laugh.

"Addison? He asks me. Are you okay?"

And then he sees her and her disappointed look.

He turns toward me.

"Don't tell me you're trying to make her jealous?

-What? No, never!I reply as I tuck my hair behind my ear.

-Addison?"

Our chemistry teacher enters the class, saving me from Charlie's question.

"I will not drop it", he says as if he read my mind.

I blush of shame of what I did and the consequences of it: telling Charlie the truth.

Maybe that's why I don't have any true friends. I always mess up everything.

"So, long story short, you said to Lara you weren't friends anymore and tried to make her jealous?" Charlie asks

We are walking in the schoolyard, on the break. Charlie tries to guess what happened between Lara and me because I refused to tell anything about it.