Honeybee (One-off Series #2)

Her

Her Point of View

Life goes a whirlwind as we walk through the brink of nothingness. My hands are cold, and my tears are dry while walking in the valley of dread; my existence becomes unknown. Why should these sentiments need to be felt? I sighed heavily and wandered.

Along the way, I met him, meters away from each other amid the loud and loathsome place. He is wearing the most endearing smile while glimpsing at me, and I felt my knees wobble. I'm living again in this lucid dream that will never transpire in real life.

Reality envelopes the worst fate of my being, and I am still striving even though I should not have to. As long as I gasp the same air as him, I will live to the extent of my existence. He rescued me, and he continues saving me.

"Hey, are you alright?" A familiar voice woke my sleeping system. I thought I wouldn't have the chance to see him this day. I smiled a bit and nodded. How can he act cool despite what happened yesterday? I roamed my eyes outside and saw that it was already dark. I realized that I was inside the library the whole day sitting near the windows.

"You skipped class, didn't you?" he whispered. I nodded again and saw him sit beside me, which made my heart throb. Why is he acting like nothing happened yesterday? The day he rejected me after I sincerely and lovingly confessed my profound feelings for him. I can still recall the long sentiments I divulged to him, I hardly catch my breath, yet I still managed to articulate my words.

What happened yesterday was such as nerve-wracking and dumbest experience I achieved in my whole life. Yet, there is no regret that clings inside me...

I was waiting outside the school infirmary, bearing the uneasiness since earlier. "I hope I can finally say it." I chanted for the nth time.

Then, I saw him went outside; as usual, a typical slender and tall guy in his messy hair, wearing a white scrub and holding a clipboard— he winked at me and fled a thump in my heart, and what made me more enthusiastic was the curved smile on his lips, flashing his white teeth while looking at me intently. Yet, the vibrant feeling changed as the school nurse intentionally blocked my sight.

"Where are we going to eat?" she asked sweetly to the guy. She turned her gaze to me and smirked.

"Miss Alcantara, what takes you here? Aren't you feeling well again?" I heard how she sarcastically highlighted the last word, and I could barely discern the loving voice she had earlier. I tilted my head to look at the guy behind her and waved my hand as our eyes met.

"I have many things to do, uh- maybe you can take your lunch all by yourself, Miss Suarez," he stated. I saw the school nurse roll her eyes and walk away. I felt the nervousness creeping into me again. I awkwardly blurted a word.

"Hi."

He mouthed the word "Hello," and walked. I followed him until we were at the corridor.

"I have something to say, Naoki." I felt hesitant at first. I shyly tucked the strand of my loose hairs at my ear and looked at him straightly. I can see his eyes glisten and a smirk plastered on his lips. Do I see things clearly?

"You look like a sheepish teenager." I heard him chuckle. "Uh, have you eaten already? By the way, what are you trying to pull this time?" I blink many times, and my mouth is agape. He unconsciously flips the pages of his clipboard and looks at me questionably.

"Botany Park, 6 pm." I squealed, slowly turned my back, and walked hurriedly. I heard him follow, but I hastened my walk and almost ran for him not to reach me.

"Hey, Ai," he shouted. I could feel my cheeks redden; he called me by my nickname. It's my second time hearing it, and I can't hide the sudden euphoria. I really like him, which gives me the resilience to continue wandering amidst the unfavorable intake of fate.

Time passed by that I didn't notice. I am sitting at the bench and constantly glancing at my wristwatch. It was five o'clock in the afternoon, and the evening is approaching. I am alone in the park because no one goes here, as the place feels secluded that you can only hear the howling wind, chirps of the bird, and the rustling leaves. It was 5:50 pm, and the lamppost beside me served as the light— and ten more minutes left. I unconsciously tap my forefinger on the table, and a few minutes later, I glimpse a familiar visage of a person walking toward where I am sitting.

As he gets closer to me, I can see him visibly, and he is now wearing a black V-neck shirt and faded jeans. I gasped for air and felt conscious about my looks, so I combed my hair using my fingers and glanced at him. I lifted my head and looked at his face, my neck sore a bit; he was towering over me, and I couldn't stand up for some reason; I felt how everything turned slow while looking at his handsome face. I diverted my gaze as he looked away, and he was now sitting beside me— yet it felt like he was still far.

"Aren't you cold?" he asked. The chilly atmosphere clings, and the hoarse tone of his voice sends shivers down my spine. I shrugged. I barely say a word, as it feels like my tongue twist.

"What do you wanna talk about?" I gulped. All the words I'd been rehearsing yesterday vanished in a snap, and I couldn't express the thoughts I wanted to convey. I coughed, and I saw how he straightened himself.

"Speak," he simply said and looked at his phone. I faced him and snapped my fingers, which made him glance at me.

"I- uh." I started, but I stopped for a while as I heard his phone ring, and yet, he declined the call and looked at me questionably.

"We should eat dinner outside first and tell me about the thoughts you are having---" I didn't let him finish; as I continued the interrupted sentiments I was about to speak.

"I like you, or should I say I love you," I whispered in the air, but it was enough for him to hear. He unknowingly looks away, and I felt a pang in my heart. I continue talking even though he is looking somewhere.

"I like you so much, Naoki. I have had these feelings since I met you that day, and I considered maybe it was love at first sight instant." I trailed off. He didn't move and still shifted his attention to the other.

"I am aware that you are way older than me. I am 21, while you are 27, but it doesn't matter as I only know the genuineness of my feelings for you--" I stopped talking as I saw Naoki, who was now looking at me softly, different from his stares minutes ago. I gulped and continued.

"I was still distressed, naive, and timid six years ago, the time you saved me. I never thought that someone unnamed and unrelated to me was the one who rescued me while I was drowning in my tears. You are the one I looked up to until I got the courage to continue, and I thought that was the only time our paths would cross, yet, you found me again three years after our first encounter and saved me multiple times." I can't hide the tears I am holding. I was weeping, and the next thing surprised me; he cupped my face and wiped my tears using his thumb. I abruptly stop myself from crying. "Shhh," he hushes.

"I am surprised and thankful; you are special to me, like someone I should cherish. A close friend." I was stiff at what he said, unable to clasp for words and aware from the very beginning that our friendship might hurl away after what I fetched, but I still did it. Dumb.

"You should go back to your dorm now and rest." I heard how he softly uttered those words and felt a gentle tap on my shoulder. I wanted to know what he truly discerned about my confession, but I remained quiet the whole time we walked outside the university. He contacted a taxi driver who drove me to my dorm.

As I entered my room, I cried all the tears and was full of emotion. I knew from the start how Naoki would respond, but I let myself push for something even though I didn't have the opportunity of winning. Yet, I smiled despite the indirect rejection I got from the guy I love because I realized and openly stated my feelings for him, which matters the most.

"Hey, you are zoning out," he snapped. I blinked in disbelief. I realized he was with me the whole time and sitting beside me while I recalled in my mind the happenings yesterday. That was dumb and awkward, yet I managed to look at him, and he was now taking a nap, sleeping. I combed his hair using my finger and heard him snoring; what a cute creature he is.

"You are the one, and you are the only one." I sang in an almost whisper. Yet, I still couldn't hide the bitterness and jolt of pain.