Lights, Cameras, & Harry Styles

26: Risks, Apologies, & Harry Styles

—Amber—

"You need to start thinking with your heart instead of your brain." Austin's voice rang through my head as I stood in the elevator that led up to Harry and I's flat. Ever since Austin dropped me off, I hadn't been able to stop biting my lip and fiddling with the hem of my shirt. I think I'd gone up and down the elevator ten times already. I don't know why I was so nervous. Maybe because I had to kiss Harry again. I'm not sure if I'll bring up the courage to do it. It was hard enough during our scene and last night he was the one that had kissed me.

It's not that I didn't want to kiss him because even though I hate to admit it, I do. It was just that I was afraid that if I kissed him again, I'd fall for him, and that if I fell for him, I'd get hurt. I guess I'm still worried that the past will repeat itself. I'm already risking it by being his friend. I don't want to risk it further by being more.

Suddenly, an old memory flashes through my mind.

  

"I'm scared, Daddy." My six-year-old self stared down at the clear-blue water. It was the first time I'd get into a pool without floaties, a lifesaver, or vest. It was just me, the water, and my father.

"You need to take risks, Amber." He tells me, his blue-green eyes staring into my own. "It's now or never."

Gulping, I nod. "But what if I drown?"

He smiles, brushing a small piece of my blonde hair behind my ear. "I'll be here to save you. I'll always be here to save you." Leaning in, he kisses my forehead gently.

I nod again, a bit calmer than I was a few minutes ago. "Okay."

"Go on." Dad urges me. "Forget the risk and take the fall."

With those final words, I step closer to the edge of the pool and close my eyes.

  

Sucking in a deep breath, I wipe away a tear that had formed in the corner of my eye. I missed my father more than anyone could ever imagine. I miss him and his wise words. And right now, right now I needed him more than ever.

The elevator doors slide open for the thousandth time, except this time I stepped out and let them close behind me. I take my time approaching the flat's front door, inhaling and exhaling repeatedly. I've never been this nervous. Not that day at the pool with my father, not during my first audition, not even during my first interview. Who knew kissing Harry again would be so nerve-racking?

Placing my hand on the doorknob, I slowly twist it and push the door open. I almost expected to find Harry lying on the couch watching television. Instead, I'm greeted by silence. Harry's nowhere to be seen. At least, that's what it seemed like at first.

"Where have you been?" A deep, husky voice asks from beside me. I jump, clutching my chest. Sighing, I turn to look at Harry who was leaning on the wall beside the door the entire time. His arms were crossed over his bare chest and his face wore an impassive look. His curls flopped messily over his forehead and his green eyes were slightly narrowed, yet unreadable.

"I told you." I speak at last. "I was out with a friend."

Harry chuckles bitterly. "Don't lie to me, Amber."

I gape. What's his problem? I wasn't lying! "I'm not lying." I snap at him. "Can't I hang out with my own friends now?"

Harry purses his lips. "Is that what you call him? A friend?" Him? How could Harry possibly know my friend was a him? I hadn't given him any specific details. So how did he know?