Sorrow's Gift

Chapter Thirty-Seven: Crash

Everyone was sleeping, but he couldn't shut off his mind enough to rest.

Maybe it was the baby upstairs in the crib, or maybe it was the dreams he'd been having lately, but something had him feeling restless.

Finally giving up on sleep, he sat up and looked around.

Karmen was on her stomach on the floor, her legs propped up behind her and a book open on the floor under the lamp. He smiled.

He tossed his blanket to the side and stood up, walking over to sit next to her.

She closed her book and sighed. "Can't sleep?" she asked.

"Not a wink," he said. "You?"

"It was my turn to stand watch," she said.

"It's quiet around here, at least," he said. "No signs of any rotters except the ones we killed earlier."

He didn't mention the baby.

"What are you reading?" he asked.

"Just something I found on the coffee table," she said. "Atlas Shrugged. Ever read it?"

"It's one of my favorites," he said. "Not exactly light reading, though."

"Tell me about it," she said with a laugh.

"I thought you said you didn't like to read," he said. He almost didn't mention it, because he liked the fact that they were carrying on an actual conversation instead of shooting insults toward each other.

"I lied," she said, and he could swear he saw her cheeks turn pink in the dim light.

"Why?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. I guess reading isn't exactly what people expect the head cheerleader to say she likes to do in her spare time," she said. "Plus, I didn't want anyone to start in on the dumb blonde jokes."

"The curse of popularity," he said. He put his hands behind his head and leaned back against the couch. "I was lucky never to be burdened with that."

"I know you're teasing me, but it's harder than you might think," she said, sitting up and crossing her legs under her. "Being pretty and popular isn't as fun as people think it is. People are always watching you. Judging you. Expecting things from you."

"So why give in to it?" he asked. "I mean, I know none of that really matters now, but why play the game if you hated it so much?"

She shrugged again and avoided his eyes.

"You work so hard to keep everyone at arm's length, don't you? Why is that?" he asked, knowing he might be pushing her too hard, but not wanting to let up. He wanted to know more about her. What made her tick? Why was she always so hard on everyone?

"You wouldn't understand."

"Try me," he said.

"My life wasn't as perfect as everyone thought it was," she said, her voice barely more than a whisper. "My dad, he was kind of a monster, to be honest. I guess I was always afraid if I let anyone in, they'd see it and they'd know."

"Know what?" His heart felt like it was about to beat right out of his chest. He'd wanted her to open up to him, but he hadn't expected this.

When she glanced up at him, her eyes were full of tears.

"Can we talk about something else?" she asked, swiping at her cheek.

Crash nodded, understanding everything now. She didn't even have to say it for him to know what her father must have done to her. If the bastard wasn't already dead, he would have hunted him down and killed him.