White As A Lie

10: Robbery

"Hi Nolan, this is Xander Tyson. Your résumé was quite impressive, far too impressive for a job like this. Unfortunately, we're going to go with another guy. We feel you'd be unsatisfied with a little job like this-"

"Bullshit!" I said, missing the end of the message that was left that next Tuesday. Didn't matter. It was probably more apologies. "It's because you've seen the goddamn articles!" I wanted nothing more than to snap my phone in half, but managed to keep calm.

I flopped down on the couch and covered my face with my hands. "I need a job. Even just a little unsatisfying job at a sandwich place!"

It was the fourth of February. If I still had my job, I would be getting my monthly paycheck tomorrow. I was running out of money on hand, and would need to break into the bank soon. Definitely within the month.

I sighed and turned on the radio, trying to distract myself from my thoughts.

R.E.M.'s Everybody Hurts on one station, Turtles' Happy Together on another. I wanted a happy medium between them, but nothing sounded like what I needed, so I just shut it off.

I ended up falling asleep and woke up about three hours later, at 2:00. Deciding I needed to get out of the house, I grabbed my coat and put on my shoes, then went outside. It was a crisp February afternoon, but the cold didn't bite like usual. It actually felt nice.

The sky above was clear and sunny, but the snow wasn't melting. It had quite a bit from the snow last month, but we recently got another coat.

As I walked down the sidewalk, I got three sideways glances, two people who turned the other direction, and one mother that pulled her child closer to her as they passed.

In less than a month, I became the most infamous person in Fairview.

Once I came upon the park, I turned and walked in. It was probably a year since I'd come here. Nicole and I would always come walk or jog during the spring and summer months.

It seemed everywhere I looked, there was a couple doing some form of PDA. A young couple kissing under a tree, an older couple holding hands. A couple about my age walking with their arms around each other.

I looked closer and realized that couple was Crystal and Alton. I wasn't sure if I wanted to hide or call out, so I acted like I didn't know they were there.

"Nolan!" Crystal called. How many times have we run into each other lately? "What are you doing here?" She smiled.

"Just taking a walk." I said. "Clearing my head."

"How's the job search going?"

"Not so good. Still haven't found anything. They won't even let me make a sandwich at Xander's."

"Seriously?" Alton asked, sounding truly surprised.

I nodded. "They claimed it was because they thought I would be unsatisfied going from school counselor to sandwich maker. School counselor is not that prestigious of a job. It's not that much of a step down."

"I'm sorry, Nolan. If they came out and said it was because of the articles, I might've been able to do something about that." Crystal said.

"Really?"

"Yeah. They would've been refusing to hire you due to what they've heard about you. That's almost like discrimination."

"Yeah, but Crystal, it's their choice of who they hire. It's not like we could force them to hire Nolan." Alton said.

She nodded. "True."

"It's fine. I'm sure I'll find something soon. Do you know of anyone desperate enough to hire a man accused of murder?" I asked, both as a joke and seriously.

"I don't know. You've probably seen them all." Crystal said.

"Maybe I can try the library aid." I sighed. "But you know librarians will do their research on me the second I apply and probably won't even allow me in anymore." I looked up at the sun above.

"Worth a shot." Alton said.

"If money becomes a major problem, could you go live with someone else? A family member or friend?" Crystal asked.

"I don't think so. My family lives all the way across the country. I don't have the money for a plane ticket." I said. "Besides, like they'd let me live with them."

"Your own family won't let you live with them?" Alton asked.

I nodded. "The ones that are still living are all on my dad's side. And heaven knows my dad is no saint." I leave it at that. "Thanks for the concern, though."

"Maybe you could live with us." Crystal suggested.

I chuckled. "No, I couldn't. You'll be married soon, and I don't want to be a bother for you."

We talked a few minutes more, then they needed to leave. I said my goodbyes, then I continued on the trail laid out through the park.

Thoughts rushed through my mind. I need money, and soon. The library is my last chance. The pooper scooper was unpaid, and I've tried everywhere else. I could look for jobs outside of town, but that means travel and travel means gas and gas costs money and money is something I don't have.

Then a different kind of thought crossed my mind, but I pushed it out immediately. No. I couldn't possibly do that. I thought to myself. I'm not a thief. I can't...I can't rob a place...

It would mean fast money.

It would mean definite jail time.

I don't know how to pull off a robbery. Let alone a successful one. But what other option do I have?

"No. No, you're not going to rob anyone. You're not in that much trouble with money yet. You could sell something." I scoffed at myself. "What kind of person would buy something from a man accused of murder? Eh, I don't know, there are some weird people out there. I could sell it online, then someone from out of town could buy it. Surely people outside of Fairview don't know about me."

I can't think of a time I was more at odds with myself than I was at that moment. I was actually considering robbing a place. But what place? The bank? A store? A house? Probably not a house, I don't need things, I need money. A bank is too heavily guarded, I couldn't steal from there. A store could be easy. Just walk in and take the money...oh, and bring a gun, too.

Jesus Christ! Do you even hear yourself right now? You're talking about threatening someone's life...

"Yeah, but I'd never actually take a life. It would just be a cautionary thing...just in case..."

I went on like this for another half hour.

***
At 10:30 that night, I committed my first crime by robbing Xander's Sandwiches and gaining $200.

I wore a baseball cap, put on a ski mask, and wore contacts and sunglasses, just to make sure I was unrecognizable.

When I walked in, Nico was behind the counter. "Welcome to Xander's Sandwiches, how may I serve you?" He said with much more uncertainty and less happiness than he had the other day.

I raised my .22 pistol and his eyes seemed to glass over. "Give me all your money." I felt like I was a kid again, playing bad guys with my friends. Only this was reality now. An actual gun in my hand, not just a finger pistol.

I felt as if I were committing the worst sin a school counselor could: threatening a kid.

"Please, man-"

"Give me all the money!" I yelled. Nico was terrified. A girl came out, Ashley from last time, I assumed, and screamed. "Quiet!"

Nico pushed Ashley away, then turned back to me. "I can't give you the money." He was barely whispering. The jock-y nerd from the other day was replaced by this scared little kid.

I pulled the trigger, but aimed above his head. I really didn't want to hurt him. He screamed and hit the floor. I used this opportunity to grab the register and break it open. Then I grabbed every dollar in there and ran out, just in time to hear Nico talking to the cops on his phone through sobs.