Rip - Trust (Completed)

Resilience

Rip did sleep. When he woke it was late afternoon and the sun no longer shone into his window. He was sore. He smelt stew. Glad it had not been a figment of his imagination, he was relieved to see the small bowl of food on the little table in his room. He got up, wondering who had brought it to him and why. Was he confined to his room? 

It was unusual for him not to wake when someone came into his bedroom. He didn't like the idea that someone had been there, watching him in his sleep. He went to check the door fearful it could be locked. It wasn't but nevertheless he was unsure if he was allowed to leave the room. 

He went to the kitchenette and heated up the bowl of food in the microwave. He was just about to sit down with it when his uncle opened the door. The boy startled and the dish fell out of his hands onto the ground. It broke and the stew splashed all over. Stew running down the walls. He scarpered backwards towards the other end of the room.

Mr Dutton was disappointed. His quiet entrance was meant to reassure the boy. The last thing he wanted was to scare him. "Enough already, Rip. I am not cross with you. Accidents happen," he sounded cross though. And he was cross but with himself. He went and got a cloth and wiped up the mess on the floor. It was the same with Jacob's nervous horses. He was no good with them either.

"Come on downstairs, it's dinner time", he said. The boy didn't want to but obeyed. Without looking at anyone he sat down at his spot between his uncle and Robert. He kept his head low, wanting to disappear, wishing he was invisible and feeling too nauseous to eat. When Jacob asked him if he was okay, he did not answer, but was glad he asked.

It was one of the warmer summer nights that year, so they all sat out on the porch. They were quieter than usual at first, and Lee and Jamie went off for a long walk together. When they came back, Lee got his guitar and Samuel brought out his fiddle. They all had their very own party piece. It reminded him of his mother and grandmother, and the memory made him feel good.

He woke up in the early hours of the morning curled up under his duvet on the two-seater on the porch. His uncle sleeping in the armchair across from him looked uncomfortable and cold, his hands folded together between his knees. Rip got up and put the blanket on him and then walked off with the guitar that Lee had left sitting in one of the armchairs.

The old man woke to the faint sound of Rip picking on the strings on Lee's guitar in the distance. Rip remembered the tune his grandmother used to sing so well but did not know how to play it. He would have given anything to hear their voices again.

***

you packed in the morning,
I stared out the window
and I struggled to something to say,

you left in the rain without closing the door,
I didn't stand in your way.

Now I miss you more
Than I missed you before
And now where I'll find comfort, God knows

Cause, you left me
Just when I needed you most

Yes, you left me
Just when I needed you most.

Now most every morning
I stare out the window
I think about where you might be

I've written you letters that I'd like to send
If you would just send one to me

'Cause I need you more
Than I needed before
And now where I'll find comfort, God knows

'Cause you left me
Just when I needed you most
Yes, you left me
Just when I needed you most

You packed in the morning
I stared out the window
And I struggled for something to say

You left in the rain without closing the door
I didn't stand in your way

Now I love you more
Than I loved you before
And now where I'll find comfort, God knows

'Cause you left me
Just when I needed you most

You left me
Just when I needed you most

Oh, you left me
Just when I needed you most.

(Dolly Parton)