Battlecry | Criminal Minds (gxg)

Chapter 26

~Present Day, June, 2010~

Elle's POV

She's going to die.

No. We're going to find her.

We'll be too late. We can't save her.

I have to save her.

You can't.

I have to.

Carli's been gone for five hours.

I don't know if she's still alive. I have to believe she is. I convinced myself I would know if she died. That I would feel it. And I know, I know she's still alive.

She has to be. I can't do this without her.

I blink away the threat of tears for the hundredth time. I let myself cry for a total of five minutes before I got to work. I need to do something to help. I can't just sit here.

But that's what I'm doing—sitting here. Morgan and Rossi are out in the city, canvassing every possible location Garcia offers. JJ and Hotch are everywhere at once, scrambling task forces and SWAT teams. It's all hands on deck. Even Strauss is helping. Reid and Penelope stay with me in the conference room, where I know I'm not doing much to help. I can't keep up with them; with the way they talk about geo-markers and metadata and terms I've never heard before. It only makes me feel worse.

I can't stop thinking about our last moment together, on the sidewalk in front of the BAU. She was saying goodbye, and I didn't even notice. I should've noticed. Should've realized, when I saw her tears, when she told me she loved me.

She says it all the time, now that I think about it. More than I do. It wasn't unusual for her to say it then. But I should've noticed. How could I not have noticed?

She's out there in the city somewhere, and she's in pain. I've seen what Murphy does to his victims, and they were only surrogates for Carli. Now that he has her, what is he really capable of?

Carli told me she once thought the world of him. That she was convinced he would never hurt her.

And now he's going to kill her.

The thought grips me with a fresh wave of panic. I grab the table edge with one hand, squeezing my eyes shut.

"Elle?" Reid says softly. "Are you okay?"

"No, I'm not okay," I snap. "A serial killer is torturing the love of my—"

I can't even finish the statement.

It wasn't supposed to be like this.

I was supposed to marry her.

I was supposed to be with her forever.

Spencer puts an awkward hand on my shoulder. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked that."

I shake my head, shrugging away from his hand. "No, I know. I'm just—I don't know what to say," I finish, voice breaking. He gives me a sad smile, about to reply, when Garcia interrupts.

"Guys. You need to see this."

I snap my gaze to her. "What is it? Did you find her?"

"No. There's something... something just showed up on my computer."

"How is that possible?" I ask, standing up and peering over her shoulder.

"I'm not sure how they did it. Yet." Her fingers clack across the keys. "But the file just appeared."