Chapter Forty - Moods and Confusion

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The mood had shifted after Miguel's phone call and we ended up eating rather sombrely and in silence. Daniel, Lucas, and I had left shortly after, the atmosphere still tense as we drove silently in the car.

Once we got back to Lucas's condo, he put the car in park, "Do you mind taking Daniel up? I'll drop you off at home after, but I'm just going to head to the gym." He stared straight ahead and didn't make eye contact once.

I nodded, going up the elevator with Daniel. "You doing okay?" I asked him. It was very unlike Daniel to be so quiet. It had me worried.

He nodded slowly, "I just don't understand how he isn't behind bars, Em. Look at me. Look at what he did to me. I can't do anything and he.. he gets to walk around? It's not fair."

Daniel took his key out and unlocked his door before entering. "Daniel," I called as I stood in the doorway, "It isn't fair. You're right. But I do know that karma's a bitch and it's only a matter of time before he gets what's coming to him. And you.. you'll never be made to feel less than because of that accident. You're so much stronger and braver than that. And nothing can change that about you - walking or not. You're the bravest person I know." I told him honestly.

Daniel peered up at me, his eyelashes wet from tears that had not yet fallen, but I knew were coming. "Thanks, Em. You know, sometimes I think you're the best thing that's come out of this," He gestured to his wheel chair. "And maybe I'm okay with that." He sniffed. "Well you and Rebecca."

I laughed, "Rebecca's awesome," I agreed. "Are you going to be okay on your own?"

"I'll be fine," he waved me off. "I have a call date with Rebecca anyway."

I left the condo shortly after to see Lucas still in the same position I left him in - staring straight ahead, his knuckles white with the pressure he had placed on the steering wheel. I put my seatbelt on and it was as if he was working automatically as Lucas began to drive.

"Are you okay?" I asked for the second time that evening.

He nodded curtly without replying.

He drove me to my apartment and parked in front of the doors, waiting for me to get out.

I hesitated, my hand on the handle, "Do you want to come upstairs?"

He shook his head.

I placed my hand on the side of his face and he instinctively leaned into my embrace. His eyes connected with mine for the first time since we heard the news and all I could see there was pain. "I don't want you driving around like this. Please come up. You can ignore me all you want."

The corner of his lips twitched upwards for a moment before settling back in a straight line.

"Please?" I asked again.

He sighed, shutting off the car and we made our way upstairs. Thankfully Ms. Smith was nowhere to be seen. What awful timing that would have been having to explain the current state of my boyfriend.

I unlocked my apartment door and we entered before I locked it behind me again. Lucas stood, leaning against my countertop, his eyes looking haunted. I knew he was reliving the moment over and over in his head.

I walked towards him and stood so that our bodies were touching. I placed my hands on the sides of his face, wanting him to focus on me and solely me.

Lucas surprised me by suddenly bringing his lips down to mine in a haste, his arms encircling my waist, his fingers digging into my skin. His lips were needy against mine as he bit down on the bottom of my lip. I gasped and opened my mouth as his tongue thrust in, exploring my mouth.

Lucas's large arms hoisted me up on his body as his hands held me under my butt to keep me steady. His lips moved with precision against my own until I felt the fabric of my couch against my back. How did we get here?

Lucas lay on top of me, but carried all of his weight on his forearms. His lips left mine, travelling to my ear as his teeth grazed my earlobe, shivers taking me over. He lips trailed down to my neck, exploring the area with his tongue until he found my sensitive spot and he sucked, swirling his tongue along, a moan leaving my body.

He rested his weight on his elbows as his hands crept under my dress that had completely risen, and rested them against my bra and travelled even higher than that, exploring me through the fabric.

His lips reached mine again, fervently, and his hands moved down slowly to trace my panties. My hands reached down quickly to stop his, "Lucas," I murmured against his lips.

His fingers trailed the edges of my panties, teasing me beyond belief. "Lucas," I stated gently pushing against his chest.

He jumped off of me and ran a hand through his hair, "Sorry," he muttered, "Sorry." His chest was heaving as he sat at the edge of my couch.

"That's okay," I whispered softly. "I liked it. I just don't think this should be our first time. Or at least not like this."

Lucas didn't reply. Instead he jumped up and walked away from me. "I think I'm going to head to... the gym."

I frowned at the way he phrased it. Like that wasn't where he would be at all. I worried about what he would do when he was feeling this way. "You don't want to stay?"

"No." He snapped curtly causing me to recoil at the harsh tone. "I just need time."

"From me?" I stuttered weakly.

He avoided my gaze, "Just from everything. I... I need to go. I'm sorry."

And just like that, Lucas dashed out of my apartment, leaving me flustered and unsure of what had just happened.

~~~~~~~

Next update will be on Saturday!

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