kind regards | womanxgirl |

twenty | she can come back home

The subtleness to Julia's dismay was no longer hidden under her facade of a friendly face, her poor judgement was mostly clouded from the disappointment in Ivy and a temper she got from her mother.

The car ride was uncomfortably silent, and to Ivy's experience, her sister didn't necessitate the need to her Ivy's explanation, let alone acknowledge her existence as it would only piss her off further.

In Julia's mind, she felt disappointed in herself. She had made a promise to her father that she'd raise Ivy correctly, excusing the moments in which Julia couldn't cope with the loneliness.

The older blonde couldn't figure where she had neglected her little sister.

Her only fault was that she gave her too much freedom that she overlooked her life as if she didn't need any help. Maybe this thing  she had with her teacher was her cry for help, or maybe she was overthinking the whole situation.

She was afraid of turning like her mother, an effortless drunk who became useless to the family as soon as she retired, and to add, someone who doubted her family's achievements and accomplishments. Their mother was a monster and another added weight to the family's problems.

However, this was different. 

Ivy was grown enough to make her own decisions and accept the consequences, and yet, Julia felt pity. You couldn't choose who you loved, and sometimes, it was a curse.

• • • • • •

Days had passed since Julia's realisation and still, she never dared to ask any questions that weren't necessary. 

She couldn't bare the thought of Ivy's harmless flirting with her teacher, whether or not it was Blake's or Ivy's fault their feelings got blown out of proportion.

Partially, she blamed Blake for this. She was the adult in this situation, despite her morals or even common sense, she still continued their relationship as if the outcomes were insignificant. 

But look where it got them.

Blake was too cautious to show up at her nightly shifts, and soon she thought about quitting her job entirely. As a result of this, her communication with Ivy also suffered. She couldn't help but feel the need to protect herself and somewhat Ivy from all that was happening, and yet the only way to do that was for their relationship to flag along the way.

Ivy had wondered if things were her fault and maybe in a way, it was. It wasn't as if she could possibly stop her feelings that grew for Blake. 

Love is love right?

Yet she never could admit it to Blake, no matter the moment. The instances in which Ivy felt obligated in hiding the truth would be too many to count for she was afraid of sharing the feeling of rejection from her lover, or even seeing the slight disgust in her face. She couldn't handle another person walking away from her, not now at least.

With Ivy's graduation nearly three months away, and her being in the house more often, things were bound to get out of hand, especially with Julia's temper and Ivy's stubbornness.

Ivy just needed clarity. She needed to know where she stood in her relationships - family and personal. This wouldn't come for her for free, and she knew that. Everything she did came with a price, and she learnt that with Blake.

Currently, Ivy was lying restlessly in her bed, drained of the silence in the house that reminded her of the uncomfortable feeling both Julia and Ivy experienced. Her eyes had slowly shut as tried to drift off into slumber, however, the sound of distant sounds kept her awake enough to recognise the voice of her father.

Curiosity taking over, she decided to follow the voices, and to her surprised, her father stood confused in the living room, his expression unreadable and Julia explained her situation. She hid behind the pillar, eavesdropping on their conversation as she kept still.

"... I just don't think she has anything over in Arizona. Both of you moved away for a reason. Bringing her back there would just make it harder for her-"

"-I don't care about that. I want her away from this place. Ivy can't keep causing trouble and expect the consequences not to exist." Julia spat, pouring herself a cup of water and downing it before she continued. 

"I love her and she knows that. We came here so Ivy could live a normal life, but obviously, I can't do anything right since she sleeps with her teacher." At this point, her face looked as if drained from life. Julia's hooded eyes were more exaggerated and her body moved as if lacked sleep.

Their father had moved from the living room to the kitchen, resting his arm on Julia's shoulders to make her look at him as he spoke truthfully. "Julia, she can't control who she loves."

Julia was about to speak but Paolo had cut her off before she had even said a word.

"Ivy's a smart girl, but I didn't raise her to run away from her problems or from whom she loves. I neglected your mother and look where it got us. I don't want for Ivy. If she believes she loves her, then she stays here with her. But if their relationship is what you think it is, she can come back with me."