"Uhm.. Sir? Can I help you?" I mumble while staring at him.
He breaks out into a huge grin, the kind of grin you see on little kids when they get their favorite toy.
He reaches out to me, and I start to fall backwards trying to move away. He latch...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
¤¤¤
Ryder and I had been sitting in this car for 5 hours. He pulled into a busy parking lot across the street, waiting for the guy to get off work.
I'm honestly terrified. I know he has said he does these things to protect me, but I never wanted to be involved in it. I had said I accepted who he is, and I do. I guess a part of me still lives in denial. That if I don't see or take part in it, it isn't actually happening. But tonight, he is set on shattering that.
I want to scream, cry, beg him not to do this. But I am too afraid. Afraid I will make it worse. Any time I try to stop him from what he wants to do, he just gets even more angry.
I know this guy doesn't deserve this. He was just concerned. I also know though nothing will change Ryder's mind.
So I've been sitting here quietly the entire time. We haven't spoken a word since he told me we would both be taking part in this.
I've been chewing any nails I have left off, twisting and turning in my seat trying to contain the anxiety. I know he knows I'm scared. I know he knows I don't want to do this. I also know he doesn't care.
When he gets mad, the only thing that matters to him is his anger. His anger controls him more than any other emotion.
"Finally." I hear him mumble.
I turn to look at him, getting broken out of my thoughts, then I look at the store across the street.
The guy, well maybe I should call him a boy, is leaving work. He has no idea his life is about to end. He tried to help a stranger he thought was in need, and now he will never fully experience life.
I wonder what his life has been like up until now. I wonder what hopes and dreams he has. I wonder which direction he expected his life to go in.
I feel nausea building in my stomach. A deep ache settling in my chest.
I want to cry.
I want to stop him.
But I can't.
I know I can't.
So I continue doing what I've been doing, sitting silently.
Ryder watches him like a hawk.
It's as if I can see the switch from a normal person, to a predator.
He waits until the boy gets to the end of the street, making a turn, then slowly sets off to follow him.
