Only You (Stevens Book 12)

Chapter 6

Sam made sure the door was locked, then turned to face Mave, who looked beautiful standing in his living room. She was looking around, taking in the décor and the marsh outside the massive bank of windows on the back wall.

"You have a lovely home, Sammy," she complimented as she turned her attention back to him.

The last time that Mave had seen Sam was at her cousin Agatha's wedding six months earlier, and there hadn't been any time for them to spend together because of all the festivities and family surrounding them.

"My room is through here," he said as he wheeled her luggage through the kitchen and down a hall to a large room with an even larger bathroom. The view from the window was stunning as the sun set over the marsh, turning everything to gold.

"Please, just act like I'm not here. Do whatever you would normally do," Mave insisted as she took her luggage from him, their hands touching and sparks shooting between them.

"In that case, we're definitely getting Chinese for dinner." He grinned as he started to strip.

"Sammy!" Mave hissed.

"What, I'm going to work out. You're welcome to join me if you like." Sam unbuttoned his shirt and pulled his undershirt over his head before chucking off his shoes and starting on his pants.

"Are you enjoying the show?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Mmmmhmmm." Mave nodded, her eyes glued to his muscular chest and arms. The feelings that coursed through her were very welcome because they felt normal.

Sam grinned, not shy in the least, as he reached for his workout clothes.

"Make yourself at home, Mave. I am going to go work off some of this sexual frustration before I have to spend a night with you in my bed. It's the only way I'll be able to keep my hands to myself." Sam dropped a quick, easy kiss on her lips before he reached for his running shoes and then left her standing in the middle of his bedroom.

He had to know that his words were music to her ears and soothed her battered heart. Her biggest fear was that she was no longer wanted because she was somehow damaged, and Sam was quickly putting those fears to rest with his casual compliments.

While Sam was working out, Mave unpacked her case, moving some of Sam's stuff to the side to make room for her things. Then she sat on the bed and rubbed her hand over the smooth bedspread that covered it.

She and Sam had always been easy with each other, picking up where they left off when next they saw each other, but the last time they had been intimate was about a year earlier when she had visited Savannah to attend Sam's father's retirement party. Mave had been listening to her cousin Agatha Stevens as she worked through some of her problems with Roark Merrick, and it had made her wish that she had made different choices with her life, specifically with Sam.

After she had let Roark into the house to see Agatha because, of course, he followed her home, Mave had texted Sam asking him to join her at the house for a drink.

He had, and they had spent a lovely night together. She owed him so much. Any time she needed him, he was there, and he never asked for anything in return. After everything she had been through, she was only now beginning to realize how selfish she had been and how much she had taken him for granted.

Mave felt the tears start again, and she cursed herself. All she was was a giant crybaby. Sam deserved better than her. He should have a wife and children. Her heart clenched at the thought.

Sam was hers!

Mave didn't know how long she sat there and cried, but that's how Sam found her after his workout.

"You didn't get very far, did you?" He smiled tenderly as he sat next to her on the bed.

"I-" she looked at him and shook her head. "I love you so much and don't deserve you," she choked. "I have always made our relationship about me, which hasn't been fair to you. I wouldn't even agree to tell our families about us."

To Sam's credit, he took what she said seriously and didn't tease her to try to make her feel better. "I love you too, and I have also had the thought that you don't deserve me. It's generally as I watch you walk out the door and leave me behind, but I know asking you to stay would kill your spirit, and begging you to take me with you would kill mine, so I let you go."

"And now my spirit is dead," Mave said sadly.

"And I know and accept that the reason you are here now is for me to help you build your spirit back up. I do not doubt that when you're whole again, you will leave me once more." Sam's face was grim as he stood and walked to the bathroom to shower.

"Why?" Mave asked, following him into the bathroom a short time later. "Why do you let me use you like that? I would never let you use me like that!"

Sam didn't answer right away as he finished his quick shower.

"Because, Mave, I am madly in love with you, I always have been, and I always will be. I'm constant. There might be a day when I've had enough, but that day hasn't come yet." Sam wrapped a towel around his waist, "and to watch you leave here with your spirit whole will be worth a little bit more of a broken heart for me."

Mave's heart clenched, and she needed to think about something else, anything else, that would keep her from the self-hatred that was filling her head.

"It's odd that everyone in my family knows I'm crazy about you, but they have no clue how you feel about me. I wonder why that is?" Mave followed him out the door like a puppy would follow its master. All the questions she wanted to ask him rose to the surface, and despite knowing that the answers could hurt one or both of them as the last one did, she still asked.

"I can hide my feelings for you from everyone but you. I can't hide anything from you, and I don't want to. I love your spirit and your ambition. I want you to succeed and make the most out of life, and I understand that I would hold you back." Mave watched Sam as he changed into jeans and a T-shirt.

"Why do you hide your feelings for me from them?" She said without thinking.

"Because you asked me to, Mave!" Sam said, slamming the drawer to the dresser and leaving the bedroom, Mave still hot on his heels.

Mave felt like she was losing him and needed to let him know how much she cared. "I sometimes think the only reason I am so confident is because I know I have you. I have always been faithful to you, Sam. You're the only one I have ever wanted." Mave watched as Sam stopped in the kitchen and bowed his head, taking a shuddering breath.

"I had hoped but never believed that to be the case. It means a lot, Mave." He lifted his head and looked at her. "You've been the only one for me all these years too."

Mave felt the tears start again. Suddenly everything was alright again, and she hadn't ruined everything with her crazy.

"Now, is this crazy conversation over?" Sam obviously felt the same way.

Mave nodded. "It is crazy, isn't it? I feel crazy. My brain is jumping all over the place; it's almost as if I want you to push me away, but at the same time, I'm afraid that you will." Mave broke down in great gulping sobs once again.

"Come on, crybaby, let's find something to eat and watch one of your movies. I'll critique everything I hate about it to get even for all the times you've left me high and dry." Sam pulled her to him and kissed the top of her head.

"That seems fair," Mave nodded, sniffing. "Are you really going to make me eat Chinese?"

"Making you eat Chinese seems fair, too," Sam insisted. "In fact, there is so much that seems fair when we think about it. A lifetime of doing the dishes and cleaning the shower, the laundry, I hate doing the laundry." That was all it took; he was off and running as Mave realized that she had some serious thinking to do about her future because suddenly, doing the dishes and laundry sounded perfect.