Waiting for Hope

Crazy on You

Crazy on You - heart

He had to get out of there. The music he loved was now noise to be despised. The friends surrounding him had become suffocating. The fire burned too hot. Everything was grating on his nerves and if he didn't get up and move he was gonna lose it. And it wouldn't be pretty.

"I gotta take a walk," Ethan said to Will as he got up to leave the bonfire.

"You need company?" Will offered.

"Nah, I need to be alone."

She had left. And he had let her. He was trying to be okay with it. He felt like he knew her, which was ridiculous after just talking to her for the first time today. But he felt like her need to leave was so strong that trying to stop her would have created a wedge between them that he would never be able to overcome.

But now what?

Three years wasted? Was it hopeless anyway? Ha, hopeless, ironic, which he seemed to notice frequently.

Ethan had tried to shake it off, enjoy hanging out with his friends and celebrate the last summer before college. It just wasn't in him anymore.

So he walked alone, down to the shore and then along the waters edge. When he got a good distance from the group, he sat and watched the slow lapping of the waves, calmed by the distant sandbar. This funk was consuming him, stronger than any summer without her had so far. He was close enough to touch her but then she was gone. He tried to tell himself not to give up, she would still be there in the morning and maybe he would have another chance.

"Damn, this is depressing..." He muttered to himself after sitting in silence for who knows how long.

"It doesn't have to be," said a voice he knew well. What the hell?

He turned to the voice and saw its owner standing not two feet behind him. Melanie.

"Hey, what do you want?" Sadly he already knew. Him.

"I saw you leave and when you never came back, I thought I should check on you. You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm great," he growled at her. Then felt bad. This wasn't her fault.  "I'm just not very good company right now."

"That's okay but if you're feeling that way maybe you shouldn't be alone."

He stayed silent, continuing to look out at the water and away from her gaze.

"I'm a good listener. Do you mind if I take a seat?"

He gave in, feeling like it was inevitable anyway. She wasn't going anywhere now that she had found him.

"Go ahead."

"Good. Now, tell me all about it." Melanie put her arm around his shoulder.

Sighing, he did tell her that he had invited Hope, and that he was interested in her. He mentioned that she was shy and had been uncomfortable so she left. He did not, however, say anything about it being a three year ordeal. That was more than he was willing to admit to anyone other than Will.

"Well, if you ask me, she's an idiot if she doesn't see what a great guy you are."

And while he appreciated her attempt at making him feel better, he couldn't help bristling at the way she referred to Hope as an idiot.

Ethan sat with Melanie like that for a while, her arm around him, saying things about how great he was. Trying to cheer him up in her strange female manner.