Divergent No War

Mmhmm you know it!

Chapter 7

The next day, I am roused by the guards. They give me some food, then have me change into Erudite sweatpants and teeshirt. I am then led to the sim room. My first sim is my fears or should I say fear. Jeanine wants to run it again, just to make sure. It starts as usual. My name second, Eric's apartment, beating, but this time, instead of blocking out the voices only, I imagine myself surrounded by a silver bubble, floating away from Eric. Suddenly, I am. The city scape beautiful as I rise up, up into the air- free. And suddenly I am awake. Jeanine stares at me.
"How did you do that?" She asks sharply.
"I don't know."
"Think, Melanie, what was going on in your head when you created that bubble?"
"Escape." I reply, almost whist fully. She sighs, she wants more, some scientific explanation. I don't have one.

After lunch with Jeanine(awkward), I go through someone else's fears. I drown, get burned, stamped, and have to kill my father. The last one is surprisingly hard. I look into his face, full of hate, but can't bring myself to shoot him. I don't know why, but I just can't maybe I'm just to cowardly to do it. I get through all of them without difficulty, manipulating my way out of each one.

Jeanine has been becoming more and more frustrated. I have corperated with her completely, but she still can't figure out what makes me tick.

The next day, Jeanine has a new serum to test. She thinks that this one will affect Divergents because it is a Pre War recipe called LSD. She wants to see my response to new fears, things that her simulations won't dig up. Just general fears, that wouldn't frighten me in a sim. 

Jeanine injects the serum, mixed with a steroid to stimulate my amygdala. Then normal pictures are projected on a screen. At first, nothing happens. Then, all of a sudden, the "normal" pictures turn into disgusting disfigured images. Full of death, decay, and vermin. I scream and squirm in my chair, but restraints are holding me there. I can actually feel bugs and clawed hands covering my skin. Everything in the pictures is coming to life, overwhelming my senses. The pictures cycle past for over an hour. The scientists are all observing me and the machines that show my heart rate and other data. Once the slideshow ends, I am too shaken up to do anything, so the guards just bring, me back to my room.

The new fear conditioning goes on for the rest of the week. Each day, I become more and more shaky. I barely eat, and I haven't taken a shower in ages. In the morning, when the guard comes in and grabs my arm, I yell and slap his hand away. I feel like things are crawling all over my body. All touch sends a wave of fear over me. The images keep flashing through my mind and weird noises are coming out of nowhere. I see winged creatures flying around my head, and bat them away. There is a constant ringing in my ears and everything is fearsome. The guard turns to me, and I realize that where his eyes should be, there are only bloody sockets, surrounded by rotting flesh. I scream, and run to the corner farthest away from him. I close my eyes and scream. My scream goes on and on and on, until a sharp jab in my neck makes the world fade.

I wake up later with a terrible throat ache. Things still look weird. The mangled guard is standing next to me. I jump back, unable to scream, due to a wire contraption, that keeps my jaw from opening. The man steps closer to me, and I shiver. His mouth opens and a tidal wave of cockroaches come out. They climb all over me, on my face even. I claw at my face, ignoring the pain as I leave deep scratches along my cheeks and arms. I throw my shoulder into a wall, trying to get rid of the sensation of creepy crawlies all over me. Again and again, I ram into the wall, until a pain in my neck lets me return to the darkness.

A bright light is shining in my face. I blink and sit up. I am in a large white room with padded walls and floor with a huge observation window, well above my reach. I am wearing some sort of jacket, that is binding my arms to my chest. I test it, but it doesn't give. I sigh. My head hurts, a lot.

Days go by. Each day is worse than the one before it. I sit, shaking in the corner of my cell most of the time. The guards told me that I am going through withdrawal from the drug. The pain lasts, night and day melt together, there is nothing left but pain. It perches like a bird on my shoulder. Always present, demanding to be felt. No sleep, no food, just pain.