I finished the chapter, enjoy ! ❤️
BEYONCÉ GISELLE KNOWLES
8:20pm
" How ? " I whispered.
That was the only word that came out of my mouth since thirty minutes. How all this could happen in such a few time ? I've came out from a bad period and here again, I've been drowned in another one.
What did I do to deserve all this ? Why can't I just be happy once in my life ? Why every time, something or someone has to come and destroy what I'm hardly trying to build ? Life has been nothing but a bitch to me. I wondered when all this would be over, will I only find happiness in my gravel ? Huh ?
I heard loud bangs at the front door and I slowly got up, my eyes never quitting from the scene in front of me. The person that did that really had no heart. I walked to the door as a zombie and opened it to a worried Onika. She took a look at my red puffy eyes and sighed before dragging me into a hug.
Then, I broke down. All the tears of all these years, all the pain, all the bad lucks, I cried it all. I cried until I had no voice.. Well, it felt like I never had one. I've always struggled to find my place in this world, and music has been the way for me. But then, am I just a musician ? Nothing else ? It felt like it. It felt like I was useless for the world's need. It felt like my existence was based on nothing.
" Oh God.. " Onika said, stroking my hair.
Only then I took note that we were now in my living room. I looked at Onika, nodding. She scanned the room, pity and sympathy in her eyes.. She was speechless. Just like I was, there were nothing to say. Just that my living room looked like a mess and that my husband was now missing.
" How this happened ? " She asked in a whisper, as if she was scared that someone heard us.
I sniffed and shrugged. My tears dried inside of me, I wasn't feeling like crying. I had enough of crying. " I don't know.. I was with you when it did. "
" Oh wow.. " She walked and took a crashed frame of Shawn and I's wedding day. " The person that did this seemed to have a real problem with y'all and your couple. "
And just then it hit me. It could be anyone, from my sister who truly hated Shawn, to my craziest fans who dissed my husband at every occasions, to his side chicks that weren't happy to see him with me or even Onika. It could be everyone, and it made me believe that I couldn't count on anyone.
" Bey.. " Onika called me. " Look at this.. "
I snapped my head towards the place she was showing me and saw a little paper hanging from a bat. I rushed on it and took it. My hands shivering, I hardly opened it and read what it said.
Hold up. I sure love him like you love him.. Slow down, honey don't be too stupid... xx
Tears were replaced by anger as I read the paper again and again. It had to be one of his crazy chicks, hell it sure was. My breathing became loud and I groaned as I teared the little paper in thousand parts. How could she ? How could that bitch take my man and think that it was even okay for her to do that ?
I took the bat and crashed my living room even more in front of a yelling Onika. All I could hear was my bad side telling me to crash everything, to let my anger out. This bad side was the one that came every time I was on stage, it was her. This bad side was the one who helped me from getting out of my depression when Shawn cheated, this bad side was the one I desperately needed.
" HOW COULD SHE ! " I crashed the tv. " WHO THE FUCK SHE THINKS I IS ? " I punched the couch multiple times. " DOESN'T SHE KNOW THAT I AM A FUCKING SAVAGE ? " I yelled.
