At the Beginning With You [Harmione]

18. Times are Changing

Life is a road
And I want to keep going
Love is a river
I wanna keep flowing
Life is a road
Now and forever
Wonderful journey

I'll be there when the world stops turning
I'll be there when the storm is through
In the end I wanna be standing
At the beginning with you

- 'At the Beginning' by Richard Marx and Donna Lewis from the movie Anastasia  

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Harry and Hermione didn't return till late that evening. After they had left the restaurant, they spent the rest of the evening walking along the streets of London. They walked arm in arm down the street just talking, mostly about Teddy and school, but sometimes other subjects worked their way into their conversation.

"Can I ask you a question, Hermione?"

"What's that?" She and Harry had been talking about Hermione's flat. How they got onto the subject, they weren't really sure, but regardless, that's what they were talking about.

"Why do you still pay rent on a flat that you don't live in anymore?"

"I still live there."

"When are you there?"

"Ok, maybe during school I'm not there a whole lot, but once school's done for the year—"

"But you weren't there a whole lot even before we got the teaching jobs."

"That's because I was helping you with Teddy. Now that you have things under control I don't have to spend as much time at Grimmauld Place."

Harry didn't reply right away, but feeling he had to say something, he said, "Teddy would miss you if you weren't there every day."

"I'm not his mother, Harry. It's not essential for me to be there every day."

"I'm not his father, but I'm staying."

"Yes you are, Harry. You are his father. Maybe not biologically, but legally, emotionally, and for all intents and purposes you are his father. I'm not his mother biologically, legally or emotionally so I'm not always needed."

"But you are, Hermione. Who else does he have? There is no other mother figure in his life." Hermione exhaled slowly.

"What are you trying to get at with this conversation, Harry?"

"What I'm getting at is that you should stop wasting your money on rent for a flat that you hardly use anymore, when you could live with us for free." Hermione laughed in disbelief and let her arm fall from Harry's, stepping away from him slightly.

"I don't want any handouts, Harry. And I don't live with you and Teddy. And I told you from the beginning that I didn't want you to get to dependent on my being there to help. I know I said I'd help as much as I could, and I have. But you're going to have to start standing on your own feet with this, Harry." Harry opened his mouth to speak but Hermione sensed what was going to come out of his mouth and beat him to it. "I'm not saying I'm completely bowing out. I'll still help you; you know I'll always be there for you and Teddy. But I need to start distancing myself. Because like you said, he'll miss me, he's attached. So all the more reason for me to not hang around as much. It has to be the two of you, not the three of us." To tell the truth, the direction their conversation had turned scared Hermione. Here she was doing her best at working towards getting over Harry and he goes and asks her to move in with him and Teddy for no reason other than Teddy would miss her if she didn't. She needed to start getting out before she found herself in a position where she was falling deeper in love than she had been before.

Harry's face was hard to read. Hermione could tell he was thinking hard, but exactly what was going through his head at that moment was impossible for her to tell. Behind his excellent mask that hid his emotion, Harry was slightly hurt at Hermione's response and frustrated with himself for doing exactly what he had told himself not to do when Hermione had began helping with his godson. No, she was right, not just godson, his son. But even though he was frustrated, he was still hurt.