Little Sparrow

Chapter Thirty

We spent most of the day decorating for Christmas.

The tree had been put in front of the living room window and we hung garland and ornaments on it, there were candles that looked like a fire hazard to me. Garland was strung over the fireplace and small colour candles were laid out across the top but hidden amongst the foliage. Mrs Atkinson had long paper chains that were hung off almost everything and they even wrapped the garland around the bannister for the stairs. A wreath had been placed on the door as well.

Mrs Atkinson ran around like a child, smiling the entire time and whistling to herself when she hung everything up. Even William did not look that excited when decorating but I did see him smile on occasion when we decorated the tree. Although it was fun, I did not quite understand where Mrs Atkinson's excitement came from. Granted, it looked nice, but it did not excite me the way it seemed to excite her, not that I would judge her for it. I could hardly be one to tell her otherwise.

We finished decorating in the evening when darkness had started to fall, and the candles had been lit. The Atkinsons did not light the candles on the tree, they were to be saved for Christmas day itself. When we were done, we sat down on the chairs around the room and I stared at the tree. The glass ornaments glittered in the candlelight and the smell of pine needles filled the air. It certainly felt like a family Christmas, but I was not part of their family, not yet.

The next morning, I would be returning to the orphanage and we all knew it, although no one wanted to say the words. In truth, I thought they wanted me to turn around over the past week and tell them I agreed to the adoption, but I needed to talk to Charity first. She would be able to help me decide what I need to do and whether I could leave without her by my side. Out of everyone, she would be able to put it in a way that meant I could understand it a little more than I did. I hoped she could help because I felt like I was going around in circles.

After a supper of soup and homemade bread, I retired to my room and just laid against my bed, staring up at the canopy. Supper had been a quiet affair, but I did not expect anything less from the Atkinsons, but even William failed to say anything the entire time we ate. He did not seem all that happy after James' comment at the shop and I expect even he disliked the fact I had yet to make a decision. They all wanted me to have one by now.

I awoke the next morning knowing I would be back in Matron's hands in just a couple of hours. I dressed in my Sunday best, leaving the blue dress draped over the chair in the corner of the room – I couldn't take it with me. After running a brush through my hair, I waited until I heard William's footsteps walking down the hall and crept to his room with the cloth-doll. I left it on his bedside table and went downstairs for breakfast.

"We promised Matron we'd have you back early this morning so we will get the carriage back after breakfast," Mrs Atkinson said, picking at her eggs.

"Alright," I said.

"We will try and arrange another visit. We're due to visit my brother's house sometime next week, perhaps you could come."

"Matron may take a bit of persuading. I doubt she was pleased with me having to stay here longer than originally arranged," I said.

"Hm, we'll see."

Mrs Atkinson said nothing more, but she chewed on the inside of her cheek and did not touch her eggs for the rest of breakfast. Even though I had not been there when Mr and Mrs Atkinson had spoken to Matron, I knew she had been less than impressed with the idea of me spending longer than originally planned outside of the orphanage's walls. She did not seem that keen on the idea of me going with them in the first place and I expect the extended stay only made it worse. I knew I would have to clean the privy when I got back.