Brooken Ficlets

Chronic

Ben is not okay. That's all. Proceed.

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Ben's P.O.V.

Rook will be here to pick me up for our date in twenty minutes but there's one problem. I can't move.

Well, I can move but it hurts to do so. It hurts so fucking much. Even the smallest of movements sends waves of pain along my arms and legs as well as my back. Making me hiss, wince or whimper because of it. The thought of getting up makes me want to cry.

But I need to get up! I can't let a little bit of pain hold me back. Er- It's more than a little bit of pain. It's actually rather persistent and not limited to just one type of pain- but that's besides the point! I'm a superhero! I'm supposed to be strong for others and get through anything no matter how hopeless the situation may seem. I can't allow this stupid pain to prevent me from doing that.

I also can't cancel another date. This would be the third date I've cancelled this month. I've lost count of how many dates I've cancelled in total. Each time this happens, I conjure up a lie. So far, Rook hasn't questioned it but I can't keep lying to him. He doesn't deserve that. As such, I need to suck this up and get ready by the time he arrives. 

"Okay, I can do this," I said aloud, trying to convince myself.

With that, I tried to sit up. Tried being the keyword. No matter how slowly I moved, I couldn't do it. The farthest I got was barely propping myself up on my elbows before collapsing back on my bed. The pain was just too much.

Everything is too much...

I swallowed hard, trying to will away the lump forming in my throat. My hands balled into fists as I gripped the bedsheets beneath me tightly. I scrunched up my face as I tried to steady my breathing. My eyes stung and my vision began to blur as tears threatened to fall.

I'm not going to cry. 

I'm not... going to cry. 

I'm not... going to...

"Fuck," I cursed, my voice cracking.

Tears rolled down my cheeks in quick succession. I bit my lip to hold back a sob. That proved to be useless as it slipped out anyway. More sobs soon wracking my body causing more pain. There's no point in fighting it now. Dealing with this near constant pain is so fucking exhausting.

bzzt bzzt

"That's probably Rook," I thought, glancing over at my phone on the nightstand.

I couldn't reach over to check but it was most likely him. There's only about ten minutes until he arrives after all. I took a deep, shaky breath. Choking on a sob half way through exhaling. Maybe I can still turn this around. I run late occasionally even after all these years. It's in my nature I guess. That can work. Now, just to force myself up. I can do this. I need to do this.

It took a lot, but I managed to sit up and swing my legs over the side of my bed. I wiped my still flowing tears with shaky hands. My body aching in protest from the amount of movement but it had to be done. I slowly stood up, my legs threatening to give out underneath me. I cried out in pain as I barely caught myself before crashing into my nightstand.

"Aw man," I groaned.

This is fine. I can do this. Just need to make it to the bathroom. Can't let Rook see that I've been crying. He would be the one to cancel the date if he sees me like this. I can't let that happen. Maybe another time but not right now.

It took a minute or two, but I managed to get to my bathroom. I washed my face and fumbled in the medicine cabinet. Hoping there was still some painkillers in there somewhere. I had no such luck. No matter. I can tough this out and ensure Rook has a great time on our date.

I inhaled deeply and hobbled back into my bedroom. Shakily grabbing some clothes out of my drawers and slowly slipping them on. I flopped back onto my bed when I was done. A whimper of pain leaving my lips. All that was left to put on were the shoes.

"I can do this," I muttered to myself, sitting up and holding back a hiss.

When I finished putting on one shoe, there was a knock on the front door. I recognized those three gentle raps. Rook is here. Right on time as always. 

Crap!

I hurriedly slipped on my other shoe and harshly bit down on my lip. Holding back a cry of pain. I grabbed a few things I'd need as I made my way towards the door. Pausing once I reached it. My hand loosely holding the door knob. I took one last deep breath before opening it. Greeting Rook with a smile. One, he hopefully didn't realize was incredibly forced in order to hide my chronic pain.

One, I hopefully won't have to keep showing him.

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Y'all... why do I do this? Why do we do this? Ben goes through too much. I can't-

Have a good rest of your day/night!