To Dream or Not to Dream

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Toronto Canada - March 2017

It had been a very emotional day saying goodbye to all of her fellow skaters and coaches at the Cricket Club. With the season coming to a close, numerous skaters were also parting ways. Isabella, however, was leaving without knowing if she would ever step through the TCC doors again.

As difficult as it was to say goodbye to the people who had become so important to her, she wouldn't have been able to live with herself if she didn't.

It had been a little over a week since she had last seen Yuzuru, since she had fallen asleep in his arms, eyes red and throat sore from crying. According to Javier, he had taken a small hiatus from the TCC due to 'personal reasons', but Isabella knew that the truth-- he didn't want to see her. Despite missing him, she believed it was for the best, as seeing him again would only sow doubt in her mind.

She hoped he wouldn't continue to miss practice, however. It was the reason for her leaving to begin with. The thought of negatively impacting his life, even when they were apart, weighed on her.

The following morning, Isabella found herself outside her apartment while Jacob loaded her sizable suitcase into his tightly packed hatchback. Unaware, her phone vibrated in her pocket. Amidst the hustle of packing and moving from her small apartment, she had hardly glanced at the device all day.

"Anything else inside Bella?" Jacob asked, motioning towards where her apartment was.

Isabella shook her head, gazing at the apartment she had become so fond of.  Countless memories had been created within those walls, including some of the best moments of her life. She wouldn't trade them, even if reminiscing about them brought a certain pain.

"No. I think that's it," the words were soft.

Jacob cast a skeptical glance, opening the driver's door. It had been a while since he had seen Isabella so distressed. Although she hadn't disclosed all the details leading to her departure from Toronto, he sensed something was amiss as soon as he heard the tone of her voice over the telephone last week. To be honest, she sounded similar to how she had as a child, after learning about her sister. The thought had genuinely alarmed him.

However, just like when they were kids, he was determined to bring a smile back to her face. He wouldn't let her sink into that lackluster world again.

"Then, I guess it is time we give border control a hard time," he spoke, painting a smile on his face.

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Isabella had spent the last twenty minutes looking at her phone blankly, the screen now black from inactivity. As the highway flew by her windows and Jacob idly tapped on the steering wheel to the beat of his music, her mind reeled once again.

To say that she never expected to speak with Yuzuru again would be untrue. She at least hoped that they could retain some form of a friendship after she left, even if it took a long period of time to get there. But, she definitely didn't expect him to be texting her so quickly. She wasn't even out of the country yet.

'I hope you travel safely. Please keep in touch.'

It was a brief text- a well wishing and a general request that one would give to an acquaintance, not necessarily a past lover, but she was surprised nonetheless.  Whether or not it was wrong or right, wise or stupid of her, Isabella couldn't help but to text him back and continue the conversation his short words had started.