Retrospect

Thirty-six

   Sitting on the edge of the roof, wrapped up in the blanket of stars above me, I gazed out at the endless ocean of all the buildings of the city, big and small. Thousands of glittering lights shone from windows, creating a soft, shimmery glow in the sky. The view up here was enough to make me pause and forget about all that I was going through. All that everyone was going through.

Breathing in, scents wafting up from the restaurant down below filled my nose and my stomach growled faintly. I managed to ignore it though, at least for now.

My legs dangled off the side of the building and I stuck my cold hands in my jacket pockets. "I'm coming, guys," I whispered, assuring my parents I was still here for them, even though they were nowhere nearby to hear me.

My mind started forming dangerous thoughts then. What if they really are dead? Can I really do this? What if I don't get there in time? Why did I think this was a good idea? What if I let everyone down? How am I going to fix this? What happens if—

"Cory," a low voice sliced through the silence. I jumped, causing me to wobble a little on the edge of the roof, just before I steadied myself with both hands on either side of me. I looked over my shoulder, surprised to see Miles approach from the darkness farther away, near the ladder.

His footsteps were quiet. No words came to mind when he stood about a few feet away, then hesitantly continued over to me and sat down on the edge beside me. I heard him sigh into the night.

It took some time for him to say anything. I tried to ignore that he was here, but unfortunately, my mind wouldn't allow me to focus on anything else. I couldn't just stare out at the city in peace, by myself.

"Tonight was crazy," Miles eventually said, though it was more of a mumble like he was reliving the events of the past hours. I just nodded in understanding, even if he wasn't looking at me.

I kicked my legs a little, hovering them over the streets below. The wind suddenly picked up and blew my hair all over the place as it tugged at my jacket. An occasional honk of an air taxi would sound a couple blocks away, and laughter would carry over to me and Miles from the civilians.

"Hey," he began. I could feel his eyes on me now, but I avoided looking his way. It felt too weird being up here right now, especially with only him. I stared down at my sneakers. "Thanks for doing this," he said.

I glanced at him. A turquoise glow from one of the neon signs across the street lit up his face, revealing the green of his eyes. I looked away. "Doing what?" I managed to ask, though for some reason my words were getting caught in my throat. I quickly went back to studying my sneakers.

"Are you serious?" he responded, letting out a small laugh. "Helping us with this Hale thing," he said. Another honk erupted in the distance.

I looked to Miles again, watching him as he took in all of his surroundings. He rubbed the back of his neck, then switched to sitting cross-legged on the very edge of the building. "I know...how much of a pain everyone can be..." he paused and I saw him crack a smile, "and me, I can be a pain too. Oh, and Malachi, once you get to know him, he can be really annoying," he joked.

I cracked a smile, feeling a warmth travel over me.

"But you're still with us somehow," he said in wonder. "I mean, I know you have like, your own problems...with finding your parents and everything. But it seems like...I don't know...you actually care about helping us or something."

   "I do care about helping you guys," I blurted. And it was the truth. Before, I'd only been going to Hale for my parents, but now, I found I'd be going to Hale for the others too. For everyone in the city really. They deserved to know what was happening behind that building's closed doors.