twenty-three

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Mackenzie

I hate that I'm counting, but it's my third week of tutoring Dane. It feels like I've known Dane for a lot longer than that. Our conversations are becoming more and more natural the more I learn about his classes and schedule. 

On Tuesday, Noah joins us in the library before baseball practice. This is a new development, but Noah shows up like he belongs there. 

Noah sits across from me, so Dane takes the seat next to me so that he can ask me questions. This makes my stomach clench and my brain melts for a moment as all I can think about is how close he is to me. I can almost smell him, and it occurs to me that I still have his sweatshirt that I've never given back. He hasn't asked for it, so it's just stayed in my bag. 

The library is cold and I've forgotten any other sort of jacket, so I ask him if I can keep it for another day. He gives me a classic Dane smile and nods. 

"Mack, are you bringing your roommates to our party this Friday?" Noah asks me while I'm eating  a snack. 

"At least one of them." I tell him.

"Is it the cute one?" He asks.

"Which one is that?"

"The one who goes to the gym with you." Noah says. "Hannah?"

"Yeah, she's my only definite yes." Hannah will be thrilled to hear that Noah has been asking after her. Almost any attention from a cute boy who plays a sport is good attention in Hannah's opinion. 

I catch Dane rolling his eyes in the corner of my vision. I glance at him and we exchange a look. Apparently, I'm not the only one with a flirty roommate. 

"Are you excited?" Noah asks me. 

"For what? Your party?"

"Of course." Noah fakes being offended. 

"It's only Tuesday, Noah. We've got a lot more of the week to make it through before we get there." 

"It's gonna be fun." Noah promises. 

"It's gonna be fun for Noah." Dane says. "Because he can flirt with your roommate."

"I can flirt with my roommate all the time. So I guess that's why it won't be as exciting for me." I tell him. Dane smirks. Noah sighs. 

"Mack, don't do me like that. I want you to have fun." Noah sighs. "And I also want to flirt with your roommate." 

"I'm sure she'll be thrilled." I say, looking back down to the papers that I'm grading. 

Noah lets us return to our silence after that and soon after he and Dane disappear to baseball practice. I've barely been alone for a minute when Kate shows up, looking quite upset. I have a hard time containing my sigh.

"Hey, Kate." I say when she sits down without even acknowledging me.

"Hannah's still mad at me." Kate says. I'm not sure how to reply so I stay silent, hoping that Kate will supply more of the conversation on her own. "I just-- I really like Lea, and I want her to be able to wait at our place for me." I'm trying hard not to take sides in this debate, so I remain quiet, watching Kate as she refuses to look at me. "Hannah says that if I don't get the key back from Lea that she'll do it herself. And I know that will end badly." 

I nod like I understand, even though I'd rather not be having this conversation right now. All I want to do is grade papers in peace. 

"Lea is really sensitive and it meant a lot to her that I gave her a key. It means that I trust her and that I want her in my life." Kate lets out a long sigh. "I'm just gonna let Hannah be mad. I can't ask Lea to give back the key." This was not the direction I was hoping the monologue would go in. 

"Kate--" I'm trying to come up with words still, but Kate looks at me, and I can already tell from her body language that she's ready to be defensive. "I think it just would have been nice if you'd let us all know you were giving someone else a key, before you did it." 

This is the wrong thing to say. "God! I knew you were gonna take Hannah's side! Why did I even come down here?" Kate stands up, clearly pissed. 

"Kate! We've been friends for two years now. You know I'm not trying to take sides. I'm just trying to help." I say. 

"Well, you're not." Kate's voice is sharp. "I guess Lea and I will just sleep at her place." And then Kate walks off. I stare after her. My roommate situation has gone from perfect to an absolute disaster in a single week. 

As if the situation can't get worse, I'm only alone for thirty minutes before Hannah finds me. I really need to find a new place to study apparently. 

"Have you seen Kate today?" Hannah asks instead of saying hello. 

"Yep." I sigh. 

"She still pissed?"

"Oh yeah." 

Hannah looks annoyed. "Damn it, Kate. If she wasn't being such a bitch--" 

I know better than to say anything, so I just wait for Hannah to keep talking. I've learned my lesson. 

"What did she say to you?"

"She just wanted me to know that it means a lot to Lea for Lea to have a key." 

"She didn't say anything about me?"

"Can't you guys just talk?" I plead. I don't want to be in the middle of this. 

"Ugh, Mack. Why do you always have to be the adult? I just want you to fuel my rage." Hannah rubs her temples and sighs. "Well, I'm not gonna apologize, but I won't force you to be an owl either." 

"Thanks for that." I say. "In other news. Noah was asking about you."

"Ooo. Dane's cute teammate?" 

"That's the one." I confirm, hoping she's thinking of the right person. 

"I can't wait to get my hands on a piece of that on Friday."

"I'm glad you're excited." 

Thankfully Hannah shuts the hell up and actually studies with me until I have to go work. This is a relief because I wasn't sure I was going to be able to keep my cool if people keep talking to me.

As if my day can't get more chaotic, a freshman decides that I'm his single hope to not fail his midterm, so I end up staying at school until 8:30, and don't even get through half of the papers that I need to grade. Deciding that Wednesday is a new day, I go home and fall asleep immediately, knowing that I have to get up early to go to the gym with Hannah. 

Wednesday flies by and luckily no one has drama for me. Mostly because Kate is absent from our house, Hannah has two exams, and Penny has basically fallen off the face of the earth. Apparently she's joined a new club and is spending most of her time with them. 

Coming home every night is oddly quiet now, and by Friday I'm starting to feel really antsy. Luckily, Hannah is still feeling her usual chipper self and has spent all of Friday, from the time that we got in the car to go to the gym, to texting me during class, to the car ride home from school, hyping me up for the baseball party.

I've been to one other sports party in college, and it was a football party, and it had not been my thing at all. Despite the fact that Dane will be there, I'm dreading this party. I'm mostly dreading having to see Dane with his girlfriend. He doesn't mention her in conversation ever, but I occasionally see them around campus. 

It's with these fun thoughts in mind, that Hannah and I set out towards the baseball house, towards a party I'm sure I'm going to regret saying yes to going to.   

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