Eros |16|

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Six months

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Six months. For six months, I've been completely alone, cut off from both worlds. The council thought it best to take Poppy, despite Kiki's sacrifice. Six months of me hiding away in my apartment and forcing a fake smile in front of my camera as I film content.

My channel is all I have left, but even it doesn't bring me joy.

I just want to be a lump in the center of my bed and never move, and I would be if I was allowed to live in the Ethriel, but I have to make rent still.

The sun pokes in through my window, prodding me to get up, as my bed hugs me tight. This is the most I've used my bed since I bought it. I've come to know every fiber of the sheets well after countless nights of studying every subtle detail, wishing I could sleep as the mortals do.

I pull myself out of bed and get dressed to get my morning coffee. A tradition I started about five months ago. It's a long walk to the coffee shop, but it's the only one I want to go to in the city. They make my coffee just as Kiki had ordered it back in February.

Probably because it's the same shop. The store is set up like a little fairytale popping right out of the page of a book. The walls are lined with printed script, while the chairs and tables are bright, bold colors that make you feel like you're in some kind of bean-filled wonderland.

Since it's a little past the morning rush hour, the shop is daily cleared, and I don't have to wait in line. A young, long-haired brunette with a ring in the center of her nose looks up at me through her thick black lashes.

I start to say what I want, but the barista cuts me off. "I know. I know. Medium caramel amaretto." The girl I've come to know as Honor shakes her head as a small smirk creeps onto her round face. "You should really change it up sometime."

"I'm a creature of habit," I chuckle, and though that might be true, the coffee every day brings me back to Kiki's shop when we were talking and laughing over books and when I caught him reading children's stories to Poppy. Each first sip brings me momentary happiness before reality strikes again.

Once I get my coffee, I walk the same route home, knowing if I get caught by the wrong Amora, I'll probably have hell to pay. As I pass Kiki's store, I stop in front of the large picture window that allows me to peer inside. As usual, Kiki is behind the counter, helping customers. He's in his element and has probably forgotten about me by now. Or I'm a bad distant memory.

The Anteros arrow did its job. By the time they dragged Kiki out of the courtroom, he couldn't stand to be near me. When I pass his shop every day, I make sure not to linger too long. The first couple of times, he caught me watching and scowled at me the yelled for me to get the hell away from him. The distaste in his eyes had me tucking my tail between my legs and hurrying off.

I keep telling myself that someday I'll move on, but today isn't that day. I watch him brightly smile at a little kid standing in front of his counter as he bags the child's purchases.

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