Where to begin? Life was never easy for Breann, the family that she came from was one toxic mess after another.
Breann's pov
The earliest memories I have was some of the most painful ones I have tried for many years to block out.
My dad was a very cruel man who had some mental health issues, he was never really loving in a father daughter way not towards me at least.
I have 3 siblings I'm the baby of the bunch so I was looked at like a mistake by him. My mother showed me true love of a parent she tried her best and I'm thankful for her.
One of my earliest memories, I think I was around 4 years old my dad got really angry one night my siblings and I was in bed and we heard our dad yelling at our mom so we got scared and upset because we couldn't help we was just kids, we seen him beating her badly and all we could do was run out the back door, run across the yard to our grandmas house, when we got to her front door she heard our sobbing and came to the door to see all four of us begging for help to save our mother. She told us to wait at her house and she went over to our house and i don't know what happened after that but she was able to calm the situation enough for us to go back home the next day.
That is just one memory I've tried so long to block out over the years. There was countless nights of my dad being angry he tried to turn his life over to god things was going ok for a while but it was only a matter of time before the abuse started happening again. I would lay awake at night crying wishing I had a normal loving family life that all my friends and cousins had, wishing my father would stop being cruel to my mother.
Over time I guess I grew numb to it. whatever love I had towards my dad was long gone replaced with hatred.
My mother tried over the years to leave him it was just hard for a single mother with 4 kids and limited help so she would end up going back to him after he would come crawling begging her to come home, saying things will be different this time...it was never different. Then when I was 15 I got tired of seeing her crying every night and I sat next to her and asked "why do you stay here if you're crying all the time?" At that time my two oldest siblings had moved out and was in their mid 20's my brother was 17 about to be 18 she didn't know how to respond to me at the moment all she could say was she was waiting for us to be grown.
I looked at her and felt the pain in her eyes, I knew she was about to give up on life if she didn't get out either that or she was going to end up killed by the man I call father.
I cried with her and finally said "if you want to go say the word and I'll pack you and I a bag while he is gone and we can get out of here and be free"
She gave me a look of hope as if my words really set in, coming from her youngest child she let that set in, we both knew my brother would stay with my dad he was his favorite child because he was the only boy so my dad showed him favoritism
The next night my phone rang it was my momma calling me I answered the call and all I heard was "it's time" I was shocked I asked "are you sure" she confirmed and that's all I needed so I secretly started packing I gathered what I could in a short time frame because they was on their way home, I had about 20 minutes to get what I could together.
Once they got home they was arguing and I was listening in to hear what was being said and I heard her say "I'm leaving" and then their bedroom door was slammed and locked with the two of them inside. in that time my dad pulled his gun out and put it to my momma's head and told her "if I can't have you no one will" she looked at him and said "pull the trigger i would rather be dead than live another day with you" he let her go realizing he lost either way it was over. We ran out and got into her car and drove to my grandmas (my mothers mom) we stayed the night there and planned to move to another state with my aunt just to get out of the small town life.
That lasted for about two months my aunt drove my moms car one day to town and ended up in a wreck, my mom felt as if she lost everything she cried her eyes out all I could do was hug her and comfort her because I was in fear she would end up back with my father. I wanted more for her more for myself if we went back it would of been the same cycle, I refused to let him fall for his lies again!
We moved back to the small town shortly after that we was staying with my grandma, my mom got a great job working at a oil refinery for once in my life I seen my mom happy, glowing and peaceful it was what she needed.
My oldest sister Marie was about to have her first child so we moved back in time to be there for her when she gave birth and when time came it was a happy moment in life my nephew brought joy to everyone he was very special I loved him so much.
Marie stayed with us the first two weeks after giving birth for help and she ended up wanting to go stay at my dads for so everyone there could spend time with the baby we didn't want her to go there just yet but we didn't expect what was going to happen next was going to happen...
This is a true story of my life.
I hope it's a good read to those that went through similar struggles.
Let me know if you want more!!
Thanks for reading and this is my first story to ever write so please be kind.
© Taylor Johnson 2023
