21. Life, Death, and Love

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(A/N: Sorry for the ridiculously late update. Burnout is slowly destroying my life. School is a bitch, and I barely have time to write new material. At least editing old stuff is easier, so these uploads should remain on schedule. Anyway, I ate a plate of nachos, then took a two-hour nap today because fatigue is real, as is the burnout. Take care of yourself, friends! Go hydrate, sleep, eat a meal, reach out to a friend, etc... Don't be like me, who is a home-bound, unhygienic hermit trying to study and write. -Beth)

Y/n's POV:

The stench of death stank up the entire cabin. Only last night, Erik had been on the verge of murdering my precious Harmony. Now, his bloodlust found refuge in the body of poor Tulip, my most beloved cow.

Maybe I paint a more dramatic picture than the truth, but in my heightened emotional state, I felt this way.

As Erik spent the morning in a long nap, recouping the sleep he had lost, I looked after Harmony and Rhapsody. So far, motherhood posed few challenges, but it was only a matter of time. I would wait until the terrible twos to revise my judgment.

In the afternoon, when Erik had awoken, he left the cabin without comment. I didn't bother to ask where he was headed. The painful formality between us had not lessened, and besides, he had probably left to chop wood, check on the garden, tend the cows, or any other reasonable activity.

What I didn't expect, ten minutes later, was for him to return- hauling the body of Tulip on to the porch, no less.

When he'd gotten the door open and heaved half her body across the threshold, I laid Rhapsody down and rushed over to him.

 "Erik, what on earth? You told me you buried Tulip."

 "No." He panted, sweat dripping down his brow. Apparently, lugging a cow to our doorstep was hard work. But I only wanted to know the meaning of it. "I said I took care of her, Y/n, for the meantime. Those cowboys might have killed her, but she can't go to waste. We can keep some beef for us and sell the rest."

 "You're going to... butcher her?" I asked, my stomach churning.

 "No, Y/n, I'm going to politely inquire whether she'd like to forage for beef in the forest with me," he snapped, making me retreat a few steps, "of course, I'm going to butcher the animal!"

Arguments would only irritate Erik more, and I didn't have the heart to deal with that. So I relented, returning to Harmony and Rhapsody's side.

In ten minutes, I wished I had put up a fight. First, Erik broke Tulip's spine over our dining table, using all his weight to snap it like a wooden ruler. Then, he pulled out a sickeningly large butcher's knife and hacked away. Blood spurted onto the table, dirtying Erik's heavy-duty apron. After asking where he'd gotten the supplies from, I received the simple answer of "Nadir".

Without the fortitude to ask more, I sat in the rocking chair, turning my back on poor Tulip, and centered my attention on the babies. I was currently sewing two canvas slings that I could hang over my shoulders. It would be much easier to tote them both around that way.

 "Will you come over here and help me a minute, Y/n?"

 "I will do no such thing. In fact, I can hardly look at you right now."

Just barely, I kept the tears out of my voice, but my scathing hurt was on clear display. Erik groaned and sawed through a thick bone.

 "What is wrong with you? You've been insufferably emotional all day. What happened to our productive, peaceful life in Oklahoma?"

 "I don't know. What did happen to it, Erik?"

At my biting tone, he said no more. He suppressed a sigh and continued loudly chopping up Tulip, likely just to spite me.

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