The Lost Luna

Chapter 7

After Ryder ruined Mommy-Carter day, we decided it was time to leave the zoo.

"Did you have fun at the zoo today?" I ask as I am buckling him into his car seat. Once that's done I open my car door and climb into the drivers seat.

"Amazing Momma, can we go back?" He asks.

"Of course we can baby, just not today" I say, "what do you want to eat for lunch?" I ask him, looking at him in the rear-view mirror.

"Nuggets!!!" He yells, throwing his hands up in the air.

"Okay Babe, nuggets it is" I say, shaking my head and laughing as I start the car and pull out of the parking lot.

The drive to McDonald's was short and I got a 20pc. nuggets with fries and coke before heading home to feed my baby.

By the time I get home it's like Carter's starving. I swear, it's like I don't feed the boy enough. Literally in 15 minutes time, he's already eaten 8 nuggets and a handful of fries. It's like I'm feeding an 8 year old in a 3 year old body.

However, he finally decided to call it quits at 10 nuggets. "Mama can I play with my toys?" Carter asks as he finished and washed his hands.

"Of course baby. But only for a little bit. You gotta take a nap before baseball practice." I say, finishing my last nugget.

"Okay mama" he says, running down the hall to his room.

I sigh, grabbing the drive-thru trash and throwing it away before changing my clothes and doing some mommy duties. I grab my little notepad on the fridge and make a list of all the things that I need to pick up from the grocery store this week.

I write down waffles, fruit loops, chicken, broccoli , spinach and some other things before putting the list back up on the fridge.

After unloading the dishwasher and vacuuming the house, I put Carter down for a quick nap. Once he was asleep I decided to head to the living room and watch some tv. However, before I could get into some Jersey Shore, there was a knock at the door.

"Oh what now?!" I say, pressing pause on the remote and standing up to get the door. But I think we can all guess who's at the door.....

I open the door and immediately close it behind me, mainly to avoid waking up Carter from his nap.

"I don't understand what you want Ryder...What part of Goodbye don't you understand. I don't know what else you want me to say!" I say, looking at him.

"Say you forgive me." Ryder replies, looking into my eyes, hoping to draw a different reaction out of me.

I shake my head hard, "I can't just forget what you did to me, Ryder. What you did, it broke me."

"I know, and I'm sorry. I was young and dumb" he starts, but I raise my hand to stop him.

"I don't want your apologies. I've been waiting of an apology for 4 years Ryder. 4 years! I waited day after day hoping you would realize what you did and come and find us, find me. But you never came. I had to be an 18 year old mother raising a child all by myself, in a new town with no family, nothing! In the beginning I thought to myself "I need Ryder, I need his help." Well I don't need it anymore. I don't need you anymore Ryder. I've come to realize I am strong without you. I'm a strong independent woman and a damn good mother and ain't nobody changing that!" I say, tears starting to form in my eyes.

"Tell me what to do to make it better, Kara. Name it and I'll do it." He pleads, getting on his knees and grabbing my hands to hold in his. Even after 4 years of not touching him, I can still feel the sparks of our connection.