Bound

Kate

Kate

I squared my shoulders and smiled as I walked into a downtown building that was flooded with late-morning light shining through its tall glass walls. The click of my heels on the stone floor infused me with confidence as I approached the receptionist's desk.

"Hi, I'm Kate Camden." I extended my hand and she held up a finger as she finished typing something.

"Okay. Hi, can I help you?" Her tone made it obvious I was an unwanted annoyance.

"Are you hiring?" I reached for the stack of resumes in my messenger bag.

"Not at this time. And we don't hire high school students." The disdain in her voice made me do a double-take.

"High school? I just graduated from Northwestern with honors."

"Oh. Well, you have a young face. And we're still not hiring."

I turned back toward the door with a sigh. I'd been at this for almost three hours. I'd been flat turned down dozens of times, had my resume filed three times and been propositioned for a date once.

I pulled my phone from my purse and saw that it was time to meet Kylie, my former college roommate. She was a paralegal at a downtown law firm, and we were having lunch at a sushi place near her office.

The lunch hour traffic was a nightmare, and the air conditioner in my '98 Honda had only been blowing hot air since my sophomore year of college. I cranked my window down and a warm breeze greeted me. My feet were sore from my open-toed heels and I'd been rejected by virtually every employer over two city blocks in downtown Chicago, but I felt good. I was out of the house, actually doing something.

I scored a parking place right outside the restaurant and saw Kylie in a small booth as soon as I walked in.

"Hey, girl," she squealed, getting up to hug me.

"Hey, how are you?"

Her baby blue eyes brightened as she sipped her lemonade. "I'm good. Lots of hot guys at my new office. I ordered you an iced tea with lemon."

"You remembered!" I smiled, fondness for my former roomie washing over me. She was one of those sunny bundles of energy who saw the upside of everything.

"Of course I remember," she said, smacking my arm lightly. "We lived together for two years. No long island tea, though, since you're job hunting. How's it going?"

"Well, my confidence is as shredded as my toes are in these shoes right now, so ..."

"It takes time. Hang in there."

I reached for the iced tea a waitress slipped toward me, sipping it eagerly. "How's it going with Lance?"

"Oh." Kylie waved her hand and scowled. "Over."

"I'm sorry—"

"No, don't be! I broke up with him."

"Well, if you're happy about it, then so am I," I said, grinning.

"I am. He's a loser. I was at his apartment one night and he was in the shower and his phone rang with a text, so I was taking it to the bathroom in case it was work. I looked down at the phone and the text said, 'I'm so wet, baby'."

My lips parted with shock.

"I know." Kylie rolled her eyes. "I held the phone up so he could see it and he was all wiping the water off his face and then he read it and his eyes almost popped out."

"What'd he say?"

"Well . . . I was kind of mean. I got all wide-eyed and told him the thought of another woman getting all wet over him made me horny. He looked like he'd won the lotto for a second. I told him I wanted to get her wetter and he was like, 'Really . . .?', and he was about to jump out of the shower when I threw the phone in the toilet and left."

I threw my head back with laughter. Kylie and I had gotten close over two years as roommates, and I missed spending time with her.

"How are you, Kate?" she asked, her face turning serious.

I knew what she meant. Of all the girlfriends I thought I had when I found out I was pregnant, she was the one who stood by me. Kylie went to the secondhand maternity store and bought me some clothes early on. We lived together when I lost the baby, and she knew I needed space but didn't want to be alone. She was home as much as she could be, but she never asked me how I was or tried to talk to me about it. She was just there, which was exactly what I needed.

"I'm okay. Graduating helped. That last semester was a fog for me." I ran my finger around the wet rim of my glass, staring at it. "I saw Quinn at a bookstore a few weeks ago and it knocked the wind out of me. He didn't see me, and I couldn't get out of there fast enough. It just brought all the feelings back."

Kylie nodded, and I decided to share something I hadn't told anyone yet.

"I went to a grief support group last week." The words tumbled out, and she arched her brows as she listened.

"How did you like it?"

I considered. "It was good. I felt like it was okay to share with them because they wouldn't judge me. It's weird, that I confided in strangers, I know—"

"I don't think so," Kylie said. "I can understand why that would feel safer."

"It did. I felt better when I left."

"Are you going back?"

"I think so," I said. "It's not like I have anything else to do. Psychology majors aren't in high demand in Chicago."

"No prospects at all?"

"I can't even get an interview, let alone a job."

"The job market's so bad, Kate, it's not you."

I sighed with frustration. "I know, but that doesn't change the student loans I have to start repaying soon, or the new tires I need on my car."

"Are you still driving that old Honda?" Kylie's voice rose with wonder.

"I have to, K, I'm broke. I can't believe I'm the girl who moved back home after graduation. I don't want to mooch off my mom, but I can't pay any rent right now."

"Just keep your head up and you'll find a job."

Easy for her to say. She wasn't the one borrowing gas money from her mom at age 22.