How to Write The 100 Fanfiction ✓

38 | trauma

if you are writing a fanfiction for the 100, there is a very high chance your character is going to experience one or more forms of trauma. with the way that the show is, there honestly isn't a single character who is exempt from this.

that being said, a lot of people tend to write trauma in a way that isn't necessarily accurate. in this chapter, i'm going to provide a list of things to keep in mind about it and how to improve your writing about it.

1. not everyone reacts to trauma the same way. back in my early writing days, i basically looked up symptoms of PTSD and incorporated them into my characters, never really taking into consideration if the way they were acting fit in well with their characterization, or making different people experience different forms of it. the truth is that no two people will have the same experience with dealing with their trauma, and you really shouldn't stockpile all of your characters up with the same 4 characteristics of people with PTSD.

2. trauma is not linear. what i mean by this is: some people assume that, when people experience things that are traumatic, the victim is hit with a lot of hardships at first (ie crying a lot, not sleeping, etc) and then the road gets better after that and all of those "side-effects" go away. that's not really true. for a personal example (and one that was what opened my eyes about this topic) was, when my mom passed away three months ago, i cried afterwards and was emotionally numb until the very end of the funeral five days later, where i finally broke down. i didn't cry again until a few days ago, when a girl in one of my classes did a presentation on cancer and i had to excuse myself because it hit me really hard.

i'm a very emotional person, but trauma affects our brains in a way that make us act differently than what we may normally do. there's no sequence or logic to it. it's not like breaking your arm, where you're miserable for while with a cast, but then eventually you can use your arm again without constantly remembering that you broke it.

3. it's not safe to not do anything about it. a LOT of people write their characters as people who don't want any help healing, keep their emotions pent up, and ignore it constantly. is this "fine" if it fits your character? i suppose. but this type of thing is done so often that it's normalized. please have your character get some form of help, whether it be talking to someone, journaling, drawing, or expressing their emotions in private. you may have heard of the "time bomb" analogy. basically, a person holes up their emotions so much that they eventually explode and are forced to let these emotions out somehow. it's a real thing, and yes, it can be dangerous for both the person and those around them depending on how they explode.

keep in mind that hitting someone is NEVER okay, no matter what the excuse is. your character/a character in general using someone as a physical punching bag as an emotional outlet IS ABUSE. (and that is why octavia punching bellamy in 3x10 is not okay.) there is never something that validates it. being angry/upset can explain such behavior, but it can never excuse it.

4. it's not always explicit. sometimes people don't even realize that something was traumatic until years later. there isn't always a lightbulb moment where someone's like "ah yes, this thing that just happened was traumatic!"

5. a person doesn't usually wake up one day and find themselves completely fine. it isn't something that you can "shake off" or decide to leave behind. it sticks like a second layer of skin and can take months, years, or even decades. sometimes, it may never fade at all.

6. even the small things can cause it. i had a toxic friend from 2nd—7th grade that affected me so much that i still struggle immensely with some of the things she imprinted on me. to most, this wouldn't seem like something that would cause trauma, but it's been almost 7 years since i've left her behind and i'm still afraid to do literally anything wrong in fear i'll be made fun of or punished in some way. it doesn't have to be something as catastrophic as war, like most articles talk about when they discuss PTSD. accidents, abusive relationships (platonic or romantic), natura disasters, battles, terrible illnesses, death of a family member/friend, etc can all cause PTSD.

7. it's not something you forget. it's been scientifically proven that you remember events that caused negative emotions more vividly than events that caused positive ones. for example, it's usually harder to remember the best day of your life than the worst one.

8. the side-effects suck. nightmares? flashbacks? triggers? those things are all REAL. the nightmares can be terrifying– not merely in the sense that the contents within them are scary, but sometimes they can be so deeply unsettling that you wake up feeling disgusting all day (or for several days afterward). when i experienced them, they happened practically every time i went to sleep for a week straight. it got to the point where i dreaded going to bed. that being said, they don't always happen right away; mine took about six months to start happening and luckily they have since subsided. 

flashbacks happen at the strangest times, and it's difficult to describe them if you haven't experienced them yourself. i can be driving and suddenly i'm experiencing them. they can be extremely vivid; it can make you feel like you're physically back in that moment. you can either be brought back to reality on your own or from someone having to snap you out of it (it looks like you zoned out because you stop paying attention to everything around you). 

triggers are hard to discuss because everyone reacts to them differently. some can cause anxiety/panic attacks, others can make you more inclined to perform destructive behaviors, you can cry, you can become really irritable, etc. there doesn't seem to be any rhyme or reason to how you react to these. it's not a stepladder where it'll be worse at first and then gradually get better. these can be literally anything that relates to trauma. i saw a tweet from a girl who met a boy at a party who used the same laundry detergent as the boy who sexually assaulted her and she immediately had to leave. 

keep in mind that i am not a specialist or expert by any means. these are just things that i have learned through personal experience and what my therapist has told me, as well as what i was taught in AP psychology in high school. this isn't meant to be medical advice; just tips on how to better understand and clear up some misconceptions about trauma to help you write it more accurately.