How the fuck did this happen? One minute I'm yelling at him and the next... well the next we're kissing. What the fuck is wrong with me? Holy crap what is happening?
On the inside, I'm falling apart, my mind is a whirl of obscenities and raging arguments. But on the outside... well on the outside, I'm definitely not acting like myself.
Frank's lips practically attack mine, and I can taste the bitterness of alcohol seep into my mouth, but that's a small price to pay. One hand stays clasped against my cheek, the other slips into the roots of my hair, holding me against him. Not that I'm even trying to move.
Frank takes the lead, considering he's much more experienced than I am in the art of kissing. His lips move with mine expertly, making me weak at the knees and leaving my stomach fluttering. That's what it is, butterflies, holy shit for the first time in my life I'm experiencing actual butterflies, the kind I've read about in books.
At first we stand there, I don't touch him, my arms hang limply at my sides, I'm too scared to touch him. But then Frank is pulling me around, and I gasp against his lips as he pushes me up against the nearest wall. His hands still firmly on my face, which I'm grateful for. My breathing becomes laboured, god, I never thought kissing would be this much work.
"Frank" I mumble, my hands move up to brace against his chest. He doesn't stop, if anything, he gets more insistant, his lips crushing mine as his hips push against my pelvis, keeping me braced against the wall, mother of god that feels good.
"Frank" I gasp, struggling to disconnect his lips from mine. After kissing me again several more times, small sweet kisses that make my heartbeat thump unevenly, Frank pulls away, he stares down at me, hazel eyes alight.
"We can't do this" I breathe, my chest rising and falling rapidly. The light in his eyes fade, and I feel my stomach drop in despair.
"Why not?" he whispers in a demand. I falter, why can't we do this? Why the fuck can't I kiss him? Because Gerard said I couldn't? Because he said that Frank uses girls? But that's not just what Gerard said, I know Frank sleeps with girls, for crying out loud I joked with him earlier about sleeping around with girls. Had he denied it? Of course he hadn't.
But then, in the last couple of weeks, I've seen a side to Frank that I've never seen, probably a side to him that no one has seen. He's been caring and tender towards me, he's took off his mask and he's let me see him properly. Shouldn't I do the same?
"See" he smiles at me as he watches my resolve collapse, and he dips his face to plant a kiss just beneath my jaw, I give a small sigh, squeezing my eyes tight against the swell of emotions in my chest.
"Frank..." I sigh, my breath coming in heavy pants. I feel his warm and soft lips against the line of my jaw, and without even allowing my body to do so my neck arches to give him better purchase. His lips move from my jaw and up over my cheekbone, his fingertips caress my face as he leaves gentle kisses on my eyelids.
When his lips depart my skin, I open my eyes again, to see him looking down at me. Not just looking, not with amusement or sarcasm like usual. With a tenderness that surprises me. There's protectiveness there too, and it makes my chest ache.
"I can't" I shake my head, pushing against his chest, but the shoves are pitiful for me.
"Why?" he asks, ignoring my struggles against him as he he dips his head again, trailing kisses down the nape of my neck. I shudder as his fingertips move to the small of my back, slipping up under my shirt to tease my skin. I crunch my eyes shut against the onslaught of sensations that he forces on me.
"Frank!" I exclaim, and aim a proper shove at his chest. He stumbles a little, and then he manages to catch and right himself. He stares at me, hazel eyes dimming. "I'm sorry" I whisper pathetically.
"It's not your fault..." he sighs, staring at the floor, eyes almost miserable "I shouldn't have kissed you, I'm sorry" he tells me quickly, and he turns to leave.
I'm gripped with such a sudden loneliness that I snag his elbow, tears well in my eyes.
"You don't have to go. Frank..." I stutter out, and he looks down at my hand like it's some kind of disease, I hastily drop it. "I-... I'm just... not ready" I mumble, staring at the floor.
A second later, my stomach lurches as he slips his hand under my chin, lifting my face to meet his. Frank looks down at me, looking sad, my guilt hits me square in the chest, almost overwhelming me. Frank dips his head slowly, giving me a blatant chance to pull away, but I stand my ground, and he smiles ever so slightly as he presses his lips to mine yet again, this time it isn't heated or borderline violent, now it's sweet, tender and brief.
If there's anything to say about Frank, he can fucking kiss. Even though it's obvious that was supposed to be the last kiss between us, he does it so well that when he goes to pull away, I move forward ever so slightly to extend it. Frank, being a gentlemen for the first time ever I think, pretends not to notice as he does finally part lips with mine.
"I should go" Frank says, looking at the door thoughtfully. Loneliness seeps into my stomach.
"You don't have to" I say quickly. He looks down at me, mischief lurks in his playfully narrowed eyes.
"It is Halloween..." he says, looking over me slowly, I shift self-consciously. "Maybe I should stay... for safety and... whatnot" he shrugs, trailing off as he continues to stare at me.
"Yeah alright" I aim light punch at him and he chuckles. "You can stay in my room if you like" his eyes light up as he nods eagerly "On the floor" I say after a moment, the corners of his mouth droop.
"Alright" he shrugs again, trying to disguise his disappointment.
So with a light laugh and a beckoning gesture, I lead him up the stairs and into my room.
Yes, I lead the Frank Iero, willingly, up into my room.
YOU ARE READING
From the Razor to the Rosary (Completed)
Fanfiction*Previously named We're Not Okay (I Promise)* Hadley had never had a great life. She got bullied, her home life wasn't exactly steady and she didn't have many friends, but all that was okay, because she had her best friend right there with her, Gera...
