Diana ( one direction fanfic)

Chapter 61

💜Diana's pov 💜

I know I shouldn't be scrolling through the social media but that notification caught  my eye and broke my heart, it looked like someone stabbed my heart numerous times .
I opened the notification and it lead me to Twitter
' rumours of Zayn Malik leaving the band'
And then some fans posted photos of him extremely skinny and then him with some producer, I didn't pay attention to that because I didn't really care but I did looked at the photo that his thinness was screaming , did I stay so much time held that I didn't notice the boys' changes?
I'm feeling guilty for not noticed it sooner but if he's leaving the band he is leaving me and poor Liam

So I ran to him hurt and furious at the same time he was laid back on the couch scrolling through his social media same with the boys
"WHAT IS THIS?!" I said serious turning my phone to zayn showing the Twitter
"Wow calm down " Harry said smirking I looked at him with a "shut up" look he got it and shut the hell up , and drowned in his seat on the couch
"  what's wrong?"Liam asked confused
" uh-" zayn said trying to find the right words to say to me
" you know that it's just rumours right?" He said kind of panicking
" rumours of what ?! What are you talking about?" Louis asked extremely confused and lost in our conversation
" of zayn leaving the band!"I said , the boys' faces fell I think it's the answer that I was looking for

I felt my world fall apart I will lost my best friend and the boys knew and They didn't tell me
" are you really leaving the band?"I asked almost crying
" No!... I mean...." he said then my brother looked at him with a "don't tell her! "Look
" I mean ...it's just rumours not all of them are true " he said trying to make me believe it
" Exactly diana there's too many rumours that are false, look ,I'm going to take myself as an example" he started " there is rumours that I fuck every girl that I see but I'm not even straight so..." he said I mean he got a point , probably I overreact again as always but I still don't believe it completely I'm not dumb I know when they're lying
" I have my eyes on you Malik " I said sarcastically " I probably overreacted I'm sorry"
" it's ok" he said he looked relieved I don't felt like they were telling me the truth but I kind of left it there, for a seconds because I was thinking ,but then I turned to them again and said" I know you're lying by the way why didn't you tell me" they start looking at me shocked because they didn't expect me to not believing it like they thought that I was leaving the  subject there and  never talked about it again but they were wrong because I want explanations ,I want answers!
" no I want to hear,why.didn't.you.tell.me?" I said between pauses
" we-we didn't want to hurt you but now that you know the truth ....yeah ....it's- yeah" Harry said
" Hurt me? Really? You would hurt me one way or another even if you tell now or even if you would tell later or even when he's out of the band !" I said quite angry
" sorry okay just calm down" harry said
" look Di, it's just an idea it doesn't mean that it would be true I can change my mind at any time so...." zayn said trying to comfort me
" I hope so... but even if you are leaving ,why are you leaving ?why are you leaving ME or even Liam because if you are leaving the band you are leaving me and Liam you know that right?" I asked
" yeah I didn't thought of that... fuck!" Liam said
" I know about that diana I know that's why it's a hard decision okay" zayn said
" and why are you leaving?" I questioned it again because I wanted to know why because he loves the boys and the boys love him I don't understand why is he leaving I thought he was happy he looked happy ,I mean he could have hide his emotions I know exactly how is that because I did that my whole life.
" it's complicated but I will tell you why, because you deserve to know the truth" zayn  said now I'm scared to be honest but I wanted to know
" Well I'm leaving because of management and Simon and you probably noticed my thinness right? It's because they don't give me time to eat because it's album tour album tour and they don't let me eat properly a good meal , because we just had about 20 minutes to go on stage and sometimes I just ate an apple for my lunch or for the  entire day and I didn't have time to eat so , and we work nonstop ,I started to develop anorexia and my mental health it's collapsing at all and I think if I continued here I would end it up dying or something and I don't want that I want to save my mental health, and myself , and I want to have my life organised ,and the racism that I suffered because of my religion and my beliefs , and my origins ,calling me a terrorist ... it's one of the reasons that it's killing my mental health" he said
I looked down trying to fight my tears but it's useless I started to cry silently but cry
I remember those nights that he came to me crying because of the "fans" calling him terrorist and some of the paparazzi calling him that too I remember those days and nights that he was crying on my shoulder and I was trying to comfort him made me sad it upsets me so much.
" I understand I really do but if you're really leaving please don't cut our contact I still want you to be my best friend" I said wiping my tears
" of course " he said smiling
he then pulled me closer to his chest comforting me and hugged me tight I will gonna miss him so much that he doesn't imagine....