OBLIVIOUS REDEMPTION

CHAPTER 73: The Infidelity

~Cheating and lying aren't struggles, they're reasons to break up~

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Saleem

Yes, I have my life, I'm living it. But It's twisted, sometimes exhausting, and full of guilt, but nonetheless, there's something there.

Lately, I hardly find time for myself. I have been busy juggling between two extremely demanding women, My wife Ameerah and sugar Maama citou. I give each one of these women a part of myself everyday

Sugar Maama citou have always had a soft spot for me, She's got a heart which let me in without permission, held me in a special place she never had any say in and then yearned for me to remain there longer than I have planned.

Somewhere deep down, in her labyrinth, her intricacy, the darkest part of her soul, she relished the mayhem. She felt a sense of privilege for having me in her life. I stirred her core, The place she dared not enter, The place she could not stir for herself. I guess it feels good to have that effect on someone

The light beep on my phone brought me out of my thoughts, it's sugar Maama reminding me of our secret meeting this evening

She threw herself at me as soon as she saw me, wrapping her arms around me without warning. She ached so badly to be held by me that it felt like a sickness had invaded her muscles and bones. And as usual, her own arms provided little comfort.

I forced out a smile, With eyes cold and dark. My energy, unaffected.

Frantic, she looked for love hiding in my eyes, in my face, in my stance, and she found nothing but disdain. And her heart stopped for a moment, so she pulled me into her bed, her naked body pressed to mine, our sweat golden and glistening in the candlelight, and then took the only thing she could, temporary satisfaction

"When are you ending things with your wife? I thought you said she is terminal" she asked, before I could finish catching my breath after our encounter

"Yes, give me some time. I'm not promising you anything though" I replied

I am not ready to think of Sugar Maama as either insane or evil, to consider in full how I could have possibly once loved and had a child with such a person. I am not ready to think about anything, except ways in which this undignified relationship may be averted

"I think you still love me, but we can't escape the fact that I'm not enough for you. I knew this was going to happen. I'm not blaming you for falling in love with another woman. I just feel pain, A lot of pain. I thought I could imagine how much this would hurt, but I was wrong" Sugar maama told me

"I do not love you like that, but only as the mother of our child" I said, which was the wrong answer to give someone like her

She insulted the hell out of me and tried to throw me out of her house naked and shamed, but I managed to get my clothes. I wore them at her backyard before heading out of the building. I reached home at about 2:30 am, I quietly crept into bed while my wife was already asleep

A terrible headache woke me up the next morning, It felt as though I have only slept for a few minutes. It has been long since I woke up with the feeling that today could be the best day of my life.

I refuse to get out of bed, in the hopes that Ameerah will head out before I did, so that she wouldn't confront me about why I have stayed out late last night. Sadly, she didn't go out

I sat up, As soon as I saw my wife making her way towards the bed.

"Morning" she chimed

"Morning love, How was your night?" I asked, not being able to look her in the eye because I knew where I have been last night and several other nights that I had told her I was working late

"My night wasn't bad, though I slept off before you got home. I'm kind of getting used to it" she said, with a hint of sadness in her voice

By the time she finished that sentence, I was drowning in my ocean of guilt

"Sorry love, I had to work late. Again" I replied, It was a lie, I was with another woman, doing to her what I should be doing to my wife every night

I knew it wasn't right, but then I told myself that things only looked wrong when there was someone to see you

I suddenly got up and pace the room, as if I can leave my guilt behind me. But it tracks me as I walk, an ugly shadow made by myself

"Is something wrong? Sorry if I have said anything that has offended you" she said, and that gave her away. She sounded suspicious, she was never the kind to apologize and she is in an awfully good mood today, knowing quite well that I came home late. Something is definitely up

"Oh please, don't apologize. I should be the one apologizing not the other way round. I just need a shower, we'll talk when I'm done" I said, as I headed to the bathroom, buying myself some time to figure out what she is up to

I came out of the shower after making sure Ameerah has left the room, I picked my phone after getting dressed and quickly glanced at the screen and there was a message from sugar maama citou

"No!" I shouted
I looked wildly around the room, for divine intervention? I don't know. How foolish of me to have left my phone in the room

It was like when you make a move in chess and just as you take your finger off the piece, you see the mistake you've made, and there's this panic because you don't know yet the scale of disaster you've left yourself open to.

I calmed myself down and read the message, it was a reply for my chat after our fight last night

"Sugar Maama Citou: I get it, it's just sex and nothing more. Sorry, But make sure you come whenever I need you" she wrote

"Saleem: Yes, it's just sex. All I'm asking you to do is to respect me please. And don't text me when I'm home" I replied

I bolted out of the room, in such a hurry to see Ameerah's expression, to figure out if she has read the message.

Ameerah turned just in time to see me running into the living room. She put a hand to her chest and exclaimed
"Oh My, is everything alright? You gave me a fright"

"Yes, was just eager to see you" I manage to say, wrapping my hands around her waist

She smiled and told me about a boat cruise she wants us to go on in the evening. I was so excited, but it was short lived because at the back of my mind, I have a feeling that she is aware of my infidelity, but she is playing a game.

But, She is playing at not playing a game. If I show her I see she is, I shall break the rules and she will punish me. I must play her game, of not seeing I see the game

She was looking into my eyes with that way she had of looking that made me wonder whether she really saw out of her own eyes. They would look on and on after every one else's eyes in the world would have stopped looking. She looked as though there were nothing on earth she would not look at like that, and evidently she was afraid of so many things. Like an unfaithful life partner

We set out for our little romantic boat cruise after dressing to suit the occasion, We moved steadily towards the middle of the lake.

Before I knew what was happening, Ameerah snatched my phone and threw it in the water

I watched the phone plummet down and splash into the dark waters. As it disappeared beneath the surface, I felt a pang of loss, staring back after it as the boat raced on.

"My love" Ameerah whispered, "just remember the wise words of Disney's Princess Elsa."

I turned. "I'm sorry?" I asked confused

Ameerah smiled softly. "Let it go" she said and I had my confirmation that she knows, she knows I'm cheating, she has read sugar maama's message

The thing that bothered me most is, I do not know why she threw love in my face and beat me with it when she discovered my indiscretions. Maybe it is because she wanted it to lead to this very moment, to torture me.

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