Behind The Alpha Book 4 CASS

Chapter 23

(Chapter song ‘Tier Abhaile Riu' by Celtic Girls,  ‘Wherever You Will Go' by The Calling)
EMBER

This isn’t a date.
I repeat the mantra as we drive out of the city into the wooded areas that surround Falcon Ridge and Caledon. 
“I know the perfect spot.”  He glances at me with a grin.
“Don’t go all romantic.  Remember, we need this to release me from you.”  I remind him.
“I know, I just think that while we collect the things we need to smash my heart to pieces, we enjoy it a little.  Might be a little less stress inducing.”  He looks then turns the car onto a forest road.  “There’s a nice sized clearing up in here  we should see lots of stars.” 
“When’s the shower start?”  I ask as I watch the trees I used to play in flow past my window.
“Soon.  Just need to park the car and pick a spot.”  Cass says, navigating the unkempt road.
He pulls the car over at the edge of a huge, open clearing lined with trees.  “I mess my wolf through here sometimes.  He likes it.  I do too.”
“What’s that like?”  I ask.
“What?  Having a wolf?” He asks.
“Yeah.  Is he as crazy as you are?”  I chuckle.
“He’s worse.  Trust me if I didn’t have dominant control, he’d be all up on you.  He loves you more than I do, if that’s even possible.”  He puts the car in park and turns off the engine.
“A wolf loves me?”  I don’t believe it.
“They aren’t complete animals.  They have feelings and thoughts too.  They’re close to their humans.  They know a good thing when they see one.”  Cass smiles.
“He tells you this?”  I arch a brow.
“Not in so many words.  More actions.  Like right now, when I look into your big, beautiful blue eyes, he’s purring.”
“Purring?”  I laugh.
“Yep…Purring…For you.”  He points to my chest.
“Weird.”  I chuckle and get out of the car. 
“It’s not weird.”  He says as he gets out too.  “He’s intuitive.  He knows you’re a good person and he likes it.” 
“You talk as if he’s separate from you.”  I spin around and walk backwards.
“He is…in a sense.  He has his opinions and I have mine.  My life is chalk full of compromise to keep the peace, believe me.”  He laughs.  “Just like you may be a love bug, but you still have the wood nymph in you.” 
I shake my head.  “No.  Valentino took that away.  I’m no longer that.”  I spin back around.
“You can’t tell me when you look out to those trees, you don’t want to dance and sing in them.”  He talks over my shoulder in my ear.
I gaze at the tree line.  “I do kind of miss it.”
“Wanna run?”  He grins. 
What now?”  I look around then back at him.
“Yeah.  We got some time before the shower starts.”  He takes off his shirt.  “Come on.” 
He undoes his pants and pulls them off.  He stands naked and wind blows all around him.  His body rearranges from his head to his feet.  The wind dies down and his textured blonde wolf is standing where his human side was.
His wolf jumps and spins around in a circle.  He barks, gives me an excited look and wags his tail.
I laugh.  “Beat you there!” 
I take off like a shot. 
I hear him bark and he runs up and around me.  His wolf bolts for the trees.  His big, fluffy tail bobbing behind him. 
When I get to the trees, I jump and grab a branch.  I fly through the canopy leaping from branch to branch with Cass running down the path below me.
“WHOO!”  My voice echoes as I make a large jump to the next tree.  As Cass comes up, I fall down, landing my boots on his back like I’m riding a surfboard. I get my balance and he looks back at me.  His wolf almost smiles as he barks.
“FASTER!”  I giggle, my arms outstretched and my legs moving with his large body.
He makes turns left and right down the forest paths.  The wind in my hair felt so good.  It took me right back to when I was truly happy.  The smells and sound of the trees fill me as I ride his back. 
I laugh and shout as his paws pound the ground.  The trees whip by faster with his speed.  A low branch came up and I brace myself.  When it’s in reach, I grab it and flip around it, planting my boots on it and leaping to another tree. 
Cass jumps over rocks and logs, he comes back around and runs back up the path.  His wolf his panting hard.
“Where are you going?”  I watch him run back the way we came.
His wolf barks and I follow.  I jump and land, straddling his back.  He slows down to a trot and I lay down on him.  I snuggle myself into his thick dense fur.  He’s so soft and his heart thumps hard in my ear.  He smells like the woods.  I love it. 
I prop my head on my hand and scratch his ears.  He trots along the path and I play with his big fluffy ear in my fingers.
I lay my cheek on the back of his head.  “Thank you.”  I whisper.
I’ve never felt so much exhilaration than I have this night.  Getting back to my nymph was not something I thought I longed for until now.  I avoided the trees because it only reminded of the heartbreak inflicted by Victor. 
Cass turned that around into something I could see as special again.  While I ran with him, Victor and his pain disappeared.  It was just me and Cass.  I didn’t think that was even possible.  I held the pain so close, yet Cass made it invisible in a matter of moments. 
He jogs across the clearing and stops.  I jump down, put my hands in my jacket pockets and make my way to his large head.
“I…I don’t know what to say.  What do you really say to a wolf?  I mean, can you even understand me?”  I gaze into his happy, panting face.
He does a little prance step and whines.  He walks to me slowly with his head lowered.
“What?”  I smile.
He whines again and throws his giant head on my shoulder, wrapping a large paw around me.
I’m overwhelmed.  I throw a hand on my mouth to fight my emotions as tears flow from my eyes.  I hug him back tight.  I’ve never had this level of love before.  I thought there wasn’t anything higher than Victor.  Cass' wolf is proving that even his wild animal side holds the love he has for me.  I’m starting to struggle with keeping my word of letting him go, but I have to for the good of Cass. 
He pulls his head back, whines and proceeds to drown me in wolf slobber.  His giant tongue licking my face all over.
“CASS!”  I laugh as I try to block him.  His tail is wagging a mile a minute as he fights me.  I’m still laughing when he shifts and his lips bruise mine.  It took me a moment to realize I’m being pulled into his strong, naked chest.  He wraps his arms around me and holds my neck.  His tongue explores my mouth like a man obsessed.  I hug his head and am completely undone by him. 
He breaks the kiss.  “I love you Ember.”  He stares into my eyes.  I can see his heart.  I can feel it.
“I…”  I start but stop myself.  I don’t want to give him what he wants.  It just wouldn’t be healthy for him. 
“Please, baby.  Just say it.”  He looks deeper as his brows stitch up. 
I want to.  I really do. 
I take a deep breath, sit back and smile.  “Don’t we have a star to catch?” 
I get up and walk to the jar.
“Right.  The star.”  He says as he walks to his clothes. 
I walk to the middle of the clearing and sit.  I take the jar off the lid. 
Cass sits beside me.  “Here.”  He hands me a beer.
“What’s this?”  I smile.
“It’s a date right?  We need date drinks.  I’ve got a 12 pack in the car.”  He grins.
“It’s not a date.”  I laugh.
“It’s so a date, shut up.”  He shoves me with his shoulder and I shove him back.
I tip back my beer and look at the sky.  The first meteor streaks across the starry, black sky.  “It’s starting.  Quick!  Lay down!” 
I push him down and he makes a oof sound.  I grab the jar and open it.  I hand it to him and he takes it.
“Just hold it up, make your wish and catch it.”  I instruct.
“This is stupid.  They’re not even actual stars.  It's meteors.”  He chuckles.
“For what we need, it’s stars.  Now, concentrate.”  I bump his arm as we lay side by side in the grass.
The stars are in the billions all over and the meteor shower begins.  They streak across the atmosphere with long, white sparkling tails. 
“Ok.  I just don’t understand this at all.”  He shakes out his arms and raises his hand with jar on its side like he’s dipping it in water. 
“Make your wish now.” 
He closes his eyes. I watch as a falling star lines with the mouth of the jar and crosses the lip.
“Quick! The lid!”  I demand as I grab his hand with the lid in it and slam it on the jar.
“No way.”  He pulls the jar down with the star bouncing around inside, plucking it from the sky.  “Wha?...How?...”  His face is full of shock.
I grin.  “You caught a star."
He sits up and lifts the jar in front of his eyes.  The small white glowing ball spins in circles, hits the bottom then the lid.  “I caught a star.”  He whispers like a kid. 
I giggle at his surprised expressions. 
“I caught a fucking star!”  He laughs loud and falls back down.
“Give me it.”  I go for the jar.
“No way!  It’s mine!”  He gets up and spins around.  He keeps it away.
I chuckle.  “I just want to see it.”
“Get your own.”  He laughs. 
“Cass, I’ll give it back.”  I say as I start to swiftly chase him.
“Nope!” 
I rush him, grab his waist and try to grab the jar.  He’s really good at keep away.  We lose our balance and fall.  Cass protects the jar and me.  He’s on his back and I’m on him.  I tuck my hair and the star shines in my eyes.  “It’s beautiful.”  I breathe.  It hovers on the middle of the jar, seemingly looking at me.
“Like you.”  Cass whispers.  He kisses me.
I push him back with an excited look on my face.  “Wait!”  I sit up and pull him up with me.  “Wait, wait…You want to see something cool?”
He smiles big.  “Yep.”  He leans back on his hands and waits.
I lick my lips and kiss both my palms.  I bring my palms together hard above our heads and my half kisses collide and explode out of my hands in a cloud of shimmering pink and white sparkles.  They rain down on us as Cass looks up and laughs. 
“Pretty cool, right?”  I grin.
“Yep.  That’s pretty cool.”  He sits up and wraps his arms around me.  “Ember, you are the most amazing person I’ve ever met.” 
My face falls.  “Cass, I…”
He leans to me.  “Do the sparkles again.”
I smile.  “Ok, but I usually need a day for my next kiss to be ready.  Incomplete kisses are pretty much let downs.”  I grab his head and kiss his cheek then slap it.  His head is covered in a small sparkle cloud. 
“HEY!”  He bellows in laughter.  I join him and he whips me to the ground.  His lips find mine and we share a deep, passionate kiss under the stars with the captured star hitting the glass. 

****

We walk into the pack house, laughing our fool heads off at the ‘not date’ we just had.  It was just becoming morning as we take off our jackets while we talk.
We stayed in the clearing for hours.  Made love under the stars and just talked for the first time.  We didn’t talk about our problems, just regular talk which I felt we needed to do.  Cass may look like an average guy, but he does have big hopes and dreams.  You can’t blame a guy for wanting everything in life. 
Puck’s in the common room on a couch.  “You got it.”  He says pointing at the star. 
I grab the jar and hand it to him.  “Yes, we did.”
“Ember…”
I shoot him a look.
He rubs his nape.  “Never mind.”  He mumbles. 
Puck produces the arrow.  He opens the lid of the box it’s in and opens the jar.  He arches a brow.  “Shield your eyes.”
We do as told.  Puck tips the jar upside and hits the bottom, coaxing the star out. 
It falls like it’s in a mini sky.  It’s sparkling tail following as it lands on the shaft.
The sparkles travel to the ends of the arrow and it starts the glow a brilliant, white, intense light.
I cover my eyes and then I hear it.
‘I wish for Ember to be happy.’
My face softens as the light dies down.  My eyes meet Cass'  soft blue ones.
“Wow, buddy.  That was a pretty selfless wish you made there.”  Puck says as he joins my gaze. 
Cass shrugs.  “It’s the truth.”  He turns.  “I’m off to bed.  Call me when your ready for the next thing.” 
I turn to Puck. 
He ticks his head.  “Honesty.  Who knew?”  He shrugs. 
I turn back to the hall.  All of a sudden I feel like crap.  A big steaming pile of crap. 
‘It’s either this or spend eternity being chased by a madman.’
Valentinos words enter my mind as I think what life might be like if I stop this right now.
Could I live like Eros?  Being chased by Cass.  He’d never have the life he needs or wants.  I can’t give him that. 
No.  I have to break the spell he’s under.  That’s his best chance. 
I just wish it was mine.