chapter eleven

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"y/n gold?" i hear a doctor ask as i look up from my chair. i haven't moved in over four hours, i'm scared sick about blue. will looks at me before we both look at the doctor.

"yes?" i say, standing up and rushing over to him, "is my baby boy okay?!"

"miss gold, we need to speak to you privately. would you come with me? i'm sure your brother can wait." he says as i squeeze will's hand, following him down the hall and into a dim room. there is a table with a computer and a chair across from it, the screen facing the chair he gestures at me to sit in.

"is blue okay?" i ask once both of us are sat as he sighs.

"i wanted to show you the x-rays we took, we managed to save his lungs in surgery. his ribs were very damaged, but only half of them broken. he has severe internal bleeding and multiple issues with his organs, but there's slight hope he will make a full recovery." the doctor shows me the screens, but i start to feel numb.

"is he dying? or dead?" i ask, shaking badly.

"im so sorry, miss gold. blue is in critical condition and due to his age, he only has a 12% survival rate." i feel numb.

my baby. my son. my blue. my boy. he's dying. he's going to die. my little boy.

"do you want a moment alone?" the doctor asks as i shake my head in silence. his device starts to beep fast as he looks concerned, almost running out of the room.

"i have to go miss gold, your son's line has gone flat." he runs down the hall as i feel out of my own body, shakily stepping down the hall and following his footsteps.

i watch in horror as my baby boy is being given cpr and other treatments, doctors rushing to stick tubes and needles in him. my heart sinks. what could alex have possibly done to him?

words like "torso trauma" and "aneurism" are thrown around as i feel color driving from my face. aneurism? the bleeding of the brain? what did alex do?

i think the world all goes numb and my ears start ringing as the doctors hear the line go flat. they slowly step away from blue as i scream, begging for them to do more. i'm screaming and sobbing as a nurse drags me into the waiting room and out of the hospital. people swarm me as i scream and cry, thinking of blue's numb body covered in bruises and painful cuts.

"MY BABY!" i scream as the world goes silent.

my son is gone. my love is gone. my baby boy is gone. the one thing that keeps me going is gone. my blue, my baby boy. he's dead.

my world drops as i heave out the contents of my stomach all over the fancy hospital grass. all my food from earlier, anything that i had ate or drank all day, just heaved into the grass. i fall onto my back, looking up at the stars with tears streaming down my face at a rapid pace.

"y/n?" i hear a faint voice say as a body lays next to me.

"leave me alone." i say, gasping for breath as i just cry and cry.

"i'm sorry." george says, not touching me to talking. he just lays next to me as i cry and scream.

my baby boy is gone. my baby blue. my little blue boy. the one i loved with my whole life, my boy. my son, i loved him with my life. and i let him get hurt. i let alex kill my son.

i let go and pass out on the grass.

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