One to blame

8☘️

Cleo's POV

"Can you be here when I wake up?" Deuce asked me as I sat on the edge of his bed

My eyes started to water as I started to see myself in his position

It was like I was 7 all over again.

Begging my dad to stay and not wonder off like he usually did.

As a child I'd see my father once a week and not because of any legal reasons..he was just a rolling stone

I felt a small pair of arms wrap around me

"Thanks kid, I needed that" I smiled as I wiped my eyes and hugged him back

"I promise I'll be right here when you wake up..or at least somewhere around the house" I giggled as I tucked him into bed

Jayson came in about 2 minutes afterwards to tuck him him

"Cleo already did it" Deuce smiled as Jayson bent down to tuck him him

"You letting her steal my job?" He chuckled as he kissed his son on the forehead

"Can you stay until I fall asleep? Then you can go to your bed" Deuce asked

I started to head out of the room thinking he was talking to his father

"You too" the small child called out

"Me?" I turned around and pointed to myself like an idiot

I watched as he nodded then walked back over to his bed

We both just sat there in silence as Deuce closed his eyes

Once he was completely knocked out we left his room

"I didn't bring a change of clothes so I'll be back tomorrow morning before he wakes up" I said as I headed to the door

"You can wear one of my shirts..if you want" Jayson offered

"Okay" I nodded

I still had a toothbrush here from the last time I spent the night and a night without my bonnet wouldn't kill me

I took a shower, brushed my teeth, then got dressed

"Can we talk?" Jayson asked as I looked through all of the lotion choices he had on his dresser

I just nodded as I picked one out..

"Can I use this one?" I asked as I smelled it

"Yeah" he chuckled

My eyes damn near left my skull once I turned it around and seen the Dior logo on it

He just watched me as I put lotion on my legs

"You wanted to talk?"

"Right...uh" it was clear he was distracted so I applied lotion to my arms and put the shit back

I sat on the edge of his bed and stared him

"Thanks"

"For what?" He asked as he frowned his eyebrows

"For letting me come see Deuce. I know we left off on a bad note but I appreciate you still letting him talk to me" I admitted

Whew that was big for me because normally I'd try and keep my foot on the ground and stand on my word

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about" he started

Here it comes

I held my breath as I prepared for him to tell me that this would be the last time I ever saw either one of them...that moment never came

"I like you Cleo, I really do-"

"But?" I cut him off

"There's some things we gotta work on" he stated

"Like?" I could feel my hands shaking so I sat on them

"Communication" he said looked at me

I couldn't say I was trying because I wasn't

In all honesty the argument we had was dumb because I knew exactly what he meant even though it came out wrong..I was just trying to push him away before I got too attached to him

I was doing what I always did which was run away

"I got to comfortable and I got scared.." I admitted

"Of what?" He asked got comfortable on the bed

Truth be told I liked Jayson too but I just didn't wanna end up with my heart broken and my world shattered again

It took me a while to pick up the pieces and their still not all there

"That I'd..that I'd get attached to you and things would go bad. I don't have another heartbreak in me jay" I sighed

"Who says that was ever my intention? Hurting you is not even on the list of shit I wanna do in life but I need for you to actually give me a chance to show you. It's like I get 5 steps forward and 20 steps back" he admitted

"Disappointment is all I've ever known..I feel like I can't give you all of me if I don't even have it"

"Then let me help you find it, stop pushing me away" he said as he held his hand out

My hands were still shaking but I grabbed his and anyway

"I know you've had bad experiences and I know you're used to fending for yourself..you don't have to do that anymore" he said as he intertwined our fingers

He was right. By holding onto all of the bad shit I was blocking out the good

"I want you to wake up in the morning with a clear head, I want you to be able to look at any problem and be like that's cool my man can fix it, I just want you to know peace."

I instantly started crying

"I'm sorry, I don't mean to be so hard to love..I really don't" I cried

He didn't say anything..he just picked me up and laid me on top of him

"I'm sorry" I said as I wiped my tears

"You've got nothing to be sorry for; cry all you need to and let that shit out. No more holding onto pain..at least not alone"

I just bust out crying again and I just cried until I couldn't shed a single tear anymore

I got up and washed my face before getting back into bed

"I'm sor-"

"No more apologizing for your emotions either..you're allowed to feel whatever you're feeling" he said as I laid on his chest

All I could do was smile

"Thank you" I said lowly

"For what?" He chuckled

"Being my safe space" I said before pecking his lips

He was shocked as hell since that's the first time we've kissed

He just smirked to himself so I kissed him again

"You keep on and neither of us will get sleep tonight" he chuckled

"Nasty, your son is in the other room" I giggled

I watched as he just laughed and shrugged

"Goodnight Jay" I smiled as I laid down

"One more thing.." he said

"Yeah?"

"Will you be my girlfriend?" He asked lowly

"I'd be stupid if I said no...of course I will" I smiled

"Good cause I wasn't taking no for an answer anyway..goodnight baby" he smirked

"Goodnight" I smiled before drifting off to sleep

Tomorrow was my weekly call with Fyn and I couldn't wait to tell her about tonight