College roommate 

5th

MONDAY 16/5/2007 5:30 am
Fuck classes start today
I normally start getting ready around 6:00 so I'll just wait till bill gets up
Bills on top of me
His pants are low
Probably from moving around in the night
Oh god
Bill starts moving so I'm guessing he's gonna wake up
He rolls over onto his back
Now he's beside me
My arm wrapped around his shoulder
It's dark but i can still slightly see the outline of his face as my eyes adjust to the blackness
I roll over practically spooning with bill
I move my other arm to his stomach
I slowly run my nails up and down giving him a light stomach rub
He quietly moans
"Mm what's the time" he whispers
"5:40" I reply
Bill rolls over
He puts his head back on my chest
My hand slides down his back to his ass
I do a small squeeze
"Auh" bill moans
"Sorry" I say
Fuck I'm not sorry
I'm turning into a complete fool and I hate it
I used to stand my ground
But I can't do that around bill
I hate physical touch, always have but then bill comes in and I don't want him to let go of me
Then I hate being complemented and all that but when bill does it I feel so special and shit
I actually hate myself right now
God
I get up rolling bill off of me
Then I get dressed for the classes
The uniform is just a white shirt and a tie with some long grey pants
I obviously look hot in it but to make it more my style I wear the tie a little low
The shirts untucked
Im wearing black air forces, my chain
And I always add a small bit of black eye liner
Not like bill I just do a small amount
I like it
Then I go to bill
"You gotta get up" I say
"Urg" bill groans
I help him up
Holy fuck his pants are so low
I can see a small vein that goes down his V line
oh god
I pull them up a small bit
Does he think of me like I think of him
Am I driving him crazy
Because he's making me feel all types of things I don't want to feel
Bill goes over to his cupboard
I watch him get dressed
He first puts on deodorant
Then he puts on his shirt
Buttoning it up all the way
Once he picks up his tie he walks over to me
"I don't know how" he says passing the tie to me
I grab it and stand up
Bill just looks at me
God
Once I'm finished I look at bill
He leans in for a kiss
My hands go to the sides of his face
Bill then pushes me back lightly
He then grabs boxers and his pants
"Look away" he says
I look away
"Okay" he says
When I look back he's zipping his pants up and doing the little button
He then puts on some cute little sneakers
EW WHY AM I THINKING SHIT LIKE
CUTE AND LITTLE
FML
AND HE TIES THEM IN BUTTERFLYS OH MY GOD
I NEED A THERAPIST TO TALK ABOUT HOW FUCKING ADORABLE HE IS
after all that he does his makeup and hair
"Okayyyy, I'll see you in 5th period, it's break period" he says
I smile and walk over to him
I put my hand on the back of his head and pull him in for a kiss
"Are we dating.." bill asks
"Um.. I don't know" I say
"Think about it" bill says and then walks out
I mean I wouldn't mind dating bill
He's nice I guess
I go over and take my pills
I hate being happy
It makes me feel guilty
I know that's stupid but I can't help it
Whatever
I then get up and leave

(TIME SKIP 5th period 12:30)
I go into our dorm
Bill isn't there yet
I jump onto the couch and start playing Fortnite
Then the door opens
Bill quickly closes it
Throwing his bag on the ground
He then runs over to the couch and jumps on me
"Jesus Hi" I say
"HI!" Bill says smiling that perfect smile
"Missed you" he whispers
"Oh yeah?" I ask
That's actually really cute
Bill grabs the controller even though I'm half way through a game and he turns off the PS
"Hey?!" I ask
"Come to beddddd" he says
I guess I am kinda tired
I get up and follow him
Once I lay down bill jumps ontop of me and lays down chest to chest
"You smell nice" he says
"Thanks?" I say
"Can I have one of your hoodies for my next class?" Bill asks
"Uh sure" I say
God this should be cringe but he MAKES ME NERVOUS
I pull him back down into the hug
Bill smells like rose water
It's not a bad smell
But he doesn't really smell like anything
After that we fall asleep

(Time skip 7:20)
I wake up to someone shaking me
"Mmm what" I ask
"We slept in" bill says laughing
"What's the time?" I ask
"Nearly 7:30" bill says
"Oh well, no point getting up now" I say
"Wait someone's been calling you, here" bill says handing me my phone
It's probably grace but I decide to just check while I'm at it
I go onto missed calls and
Fuck-
I quickly turn my phone off
"Who was it?" Bill asks
"Uh no one" I say
"Y/n.."
"Just someone I used to talk to, nothing crazy" I say rolling onto my back so I can face bill
Bill crawls onto my lap
"Don't lie to me" he whispers
"I- ah I'm not w-why" I stutter
Bill slides his hand down my body and lands on my belt
"I don't like liars" he says
Ohhh god
"MmMmm" I moan quietly
Bill then tries getting up
"OKAY okay I'll tell you" I say grabbing his hips and pulling him back onto me
"It was this guy, Ash, I um I knew him in Highschool, I wasn't into relationships but I'd fuck with him" I say
"Oh?" Bill says
"Don't worry it really didn't mean shit" I say
"Do you think of me like that" bill says
"No I like you" I say
"Prove it" bill says
"How" I ask
Bill thinks for a second
"Tomorrow we are gonna skip school, and we are gonna go on a date" bill says
Oh god
"If that makes you happy" I say
"Oh and block him or I swear to god I will-
"Okay Okay look" I say handing my phone to bill
He sees I blocked Ash
Bill smiles and lays down on my chest
God I love him
WHAT
NO
I DONT
SHIT