Not so clever

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My heart is never on the right side
It is there for what is left to keep and find
I did bad stuff
Yea I did a lot
I deserve to be punished
But I'm seeking vengeance
All I see is rubish
Hell! Where is your entrance?
I hate myself still I mean no hram to them
All I did was ran
When I stood up I made it worse than ever
To keep running why does it matter
I am not a monster. I am just a man
A boy doing the best he can
As I can see my hands are cursed
Maybe not the last maybe not the first
I'm really a guy who wants to help
All those things that I felt
It came  from the skies
Like a fog full of lies
God or Devil, something different, something new?
I don't have a clue
Now I'm really tired
With chains of hell my soul wired
Mind dead and heart tired
Maybe I'm running all alone
But something is with me that I'm running from

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