LOVESICK

Chapter Forty Six: A Chance to Help

"Why didn't you wake me up?" Ivan walked to the kitchen where i was making some coffee,I opened the windows for some fresh air to get in,after a long night of rain and thunderstorms the sun was finally shining and it was warm again,So I wore my black dress with white poka dots.

"Well I figured i should let you rest more,you barely had any rest the past four days." I replied leaning on the countertop and crossing my arms,
"God it's so suffocating here.." he pulled the chair and sat on it,he rubbed his eyes and laid his head on the table between his arms,

"It's not that depressing,look at the brighter side" I replied taking out two mugs,
I poured some hot coffee in the cups and walked to the table,i put his cup close to him as i took a seat in front of his.

"There is no brighter side" he grunted and raised his head grabbing his cup.
"Thank you.."
"You're welcome." I replied.
"So,i was thinking maybe we could go on a walk to the nearby grocery store,there is a park around there maybe you'd like to freshen up.." i spoke pretty sure he'd refuse.

"Park?" He raised one of his eyebrows and put down his coffee cup,
"Yes..we could go on a walk together.." I repeated avoiding eye contact,
He sighed and lowered his head,
"It's okay if you don't feel like it,I'm not forcing you or anything," I quickly added because i was sure he was about to say no,

"Let's go" he interrupted,
"Let's go have a walk to the park then.."
"Really?" I asked surprised,
He nodded with a smile,

"Wouldn't William mind?" I asked more surprised,
"He wouldn't,plus even if he did..who cares,I want to go out on a walk with you" he answered with a shrug,
"You know you should be more like this sometimes," i joked and he chuckled gently,

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"Wouldn't William be a little worried if he came home and we weren't there?" I asked
"He can call us you know?" He replied closing the house's door after him. We started walking away from the house,For once he wasn't wearing his normal suit and tie,he was always formal but today he wore a casual hoodie with some black pants,
he took my hand locked his fingers with mine,
This is probably the most normal we could ever be.

"You know..." I cleared my throat and spoke breaking the silence,
"We should be normal like this every once in a while.."
"Normal?" He repeated confused,
"Yeah,normal like,taking walks together or just staying at a nearby cafeteria,or going on a picnic on the beach,just normal things that don't require tons of security and money and luxury" I explained,

"If thats what you wish for I won't hesitate doing." He replied with a faint cold tone.
"But you know,sometimes you have to realize that we can't fabricate our reality,I'm not normal..and my job is not normal,and there are people hiding in the crowds,people who want to haunt us down,people who want our power."
"I do realize that,but i like to daydream sometimes." I added.

"Don't you want to be powerful? Don't you want to control everything and everyone? With a single snap of your fingers..hundreds of people will obey you,you might want simplicity Irene...but power..is way more fun and desirable" he interrupted,
"Power is meaningless if you live a life based on murder,drugs,stealing and money" I replied coldly,

"But does it have to be? Your life could be simply based on helping others,I know how pure you are,i know how you love helping others and how the murders you've committed are eating you up,so why don't you become the better half and make something that doesn't require a dark underworld?" He paused in his spot and faced me,

"You can do everything i wished to do when i was still pure and innocent like you.." He let go of my hand to caress my cheek,
"You haven't seen this ugly dark world I'm living in,I've seen some things that give me nightmares and haunt me to this day,and I don't want you to see these things,this dark dark place,it's dangerous for a fragile glass like you.."