𝘾𝙍𝘼𝙎𝙃𝙄𝙉𝙂 𝙄𝙉𝙏𝙊 𝙔𝙊𝙐 ↣ 𝙊𝙉𝙀 𝘿𝙄𝙍𝙀𝘾𝙏𝙄𝙊𝙉

DRAG ME DOWN

[quick summary: Louis took things too quickly and was too rough on Mickey. She realized that even though she wanted to make him happy, she couldn't deal with the fear that accompanied it.]

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I couldn't handle it.

"Stop!" I yelped, "stop, stop, get off, stop, please-"

"Easy," Louis said. He pulled his body off of mine and dropped my hands. I rolled over onto my back and pressed one of my hands into my chest, above the silver locket I hadn't taken off since my birthday. "Love? Talk to me, please?"

I didn't say anything. I looked up at the ceiling and tried to calm down. Louis sat down on the bed next to me and I fumbled to grab onto his hand.

Eventually, I found my voice.

"I'm sorry," I whispered. Louis looked down at me and his frown grew even more.

"Hey, don't say that, love. I told you if you ever need me to stop, I want you to tell me, didn't I? I'm not upset with you," he mumbled, kissing my knuckles, "do you want to tell me what's wrong?"

"You just- I-" I stuttered. I didn't want to blame him for my problems.

It wasn't his fault that I couldn't handle it.

"Never mind, Lou, it's not important."

Louis laid back onto the bed next to me. I tipped my head towards him. "You can tell me, love."

"Can you please drop it?"

"No," Louis said, "this is the part where you have to communicate your problems so we can come up with a solution, love."

I pressed my lips together and looked back up at the ceiling. "You just scared me a little bit, that's all."

"Hm?" Louis hummed quietly, prompting me to continue.

"Right when we walked in here you were just... you never stopped to ask me anything. I tried to ask you to slow down a little bit... but you told me not to talk, when I tried. I know that you're stressed about Zayn leaving and I want to help you with that, so I was just gonna go with it and let you do what you wanted."

"I'm sorry, love, I wasn't even thinking- but please don't feel like you need to just let me have my way with you. Your body isn't mine to use, you know?"

"Yeah, that's the other thing," I mumbled, "do you remember our first time when I asked you not to call me yours?"

I watched the realization wash over his face.

"Oh, fuck, I'm so sorry, lovie! I forgot that we talked about that," Louis mumbled, "I did that, didn't I?"

"And like, it might not have even been that big of a thing- but you had my hands pinned behind my back- and I just- you scared me," I said, stumbling over my words. I craned my neck to look at him. He was looking up at the ceiling. "I know that you didn't do it on purpose, and I'm not mad. I just... I need you to remember next time, okay?"

Louis finally looked over at me. I squeezed his hand and leaned into him so my forehead could touch his.

"I'll remember," Louis promised, "and if I don't, please don't wait so long to tell me to stop, okay?"

"I just wanted to make you happy," I whispered.

"I'm not happy if you don't feel safe and comfortable with me, love, you know that. And hey?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for telling me."

"Always," I said.