The Dead Fleet (Juggernaut #3)

Seventy Nine

Ellie was restless.

To her surprise, it had turned out that for Ellie, the journey home had meant more than the arrival. This puzzled her. The space city was the only home she had ever really known, and beyond her jaunts over and around the surface of the Juggernaut, she had never considered leaving.

Until now.

Because until now other worlds, other suns and cities, and other people, were things she had only heard about. They were intellectual curiosities, nothing more, so they became images and stories of places that she knew existed out there somewhere, but they had never been real.

Until now.

Ellie still felt the thrill of the race, and the inevitable victory, but now there was something missing. Something intangible. Tila had told her to be memorable so Ellie had done her best, but this was new territory for her. This was a course where she had no experience. She had never had the interest.

Until now.

Until Parador.

Until Jayce.

So Tila thought he was an idiot? What did she know? Like Tila knew anything about boys? She knew how to hit them but she did that with everyone. Maybe her opinion didn't count for very much. Not this time.

Malachi and Jayce had seemed to get along. Maybe Malachi was the one she should be talking to? He was the problem solver, but this was a strange new problem. Besides, he never seemed to get anywhere with Nina, despite Ellie's encouragement and Nina's obvious interest.

Why am I unsure now about Jayce and me when I was sure about Malachi and Nina?

She couldn't talk to Tila. She couldn't talk to Malachi. She didn't know Nina well enough to ask, and she didn't value anyone else's opinion.

Almost anyone.

'Come in.'

Ellie stepped into Theo's office. He had made some upgrades since she was last here, which now she stopped to think about it, was a long time ago. They usually met in passing, or at public gatherings, or that other life when she had wished him a happy birthday.

She sat and waited for him to ask her all the right questions. That would make it easier.

Theo, though, was not aware of the part he had been scheduled to play in Ellie's journey.

'What can I do for you, Ellie?'

'Um,' said Ellie, avoiding the question for as long as possible.

Theo leaned back in his chair and put his datapad down. Ellie at a loss for words was an unusual sight.

'You must be glad to be home,' he said.

Ellie looked down at the floor, then up at the ceiling. He needed a new light panel, she noted.

Theo followed her gaze and tried again. 'What do you see up there, Ellie?'

'Not enough,' she said.

Puzzled, Theo looked closer at the broken panel. 'Not enough what?'

'Not enough up. Look, it stops there. That's it. We don't have enough.'

'Enough up?'

'Exactly.'

'Ellie, I'm afraid you're going to have to start from the beginning.'

So Ellie sighed and took a breath, and explained everything. Not just the story of their adventure, but what it meant to her and how it made her feel, what she had returned to, and what she had left behind.