His Best Friend's Sister A Sirius Black X Reader.

chapter 27: you are the strongest girl i know

Sirius pov

I woke up to y/n breathing heavily next to me. I sat up and heard James do the same. I tried waking her up for around twenty minutes before James got up.

"Shit" he muttered walking over. I rubbed her arm and tried to wake her up. James was digging in his trunk and got something before walking over.

"Haven't had to use this since her 3rd year" he said sitting down next to her. He had a potion in his hands and dipped some of it onto a towel before putting it on her forehead. I watched as she calmed down before waking up slowly. He took the towel off and threw it on the bed behind him. She looked at him and then at me before sighing.

"Sorry" she muttered

"Don't apologize" James said. "You're ok"

She rested her head back with a groan.

"I fucking hate nightmares" she mumbled. I put an arm around her stomach.

"I know love" I whispered into her shoulder. "I know"

"Are you ok here with Sirius?" James asked

"Yeah" She whispered.

"Ok" He got up and walked away. She turned her head to look at me.

"I'm sor-"

"No," I said putting a finger to her lips. "Not your fault. I want to help you and I want you to feel ok with me and safe. You never need to apologize for nightmares" I said pressing a kiss to her temple.

"Ok," she whispered. She moved closer to me and nuzzled into my chest. I kissed her forehead a couple of times. She looked up at me before pressing her lips to mine. It was soft and I could tell she needed someone. She was hurting and I wanted to stop the hurting. The screaming. The nightmares. All of it. Why does this one girl have to deal with all that weight? All that pressure that she shouldn't have to deal with. I kissed back before pulling away after a little bit. She pushed her head back into my shoulder.

"I just want it to be over" She whispered.

"I do to love." I said rubbing her back gently. She let out a small sob as she grabbed the back of the sweatshirt I was wearing. "I do to" I whispered.

•☆•☆•

I woke up a couple of hours later to a empty half of the bed. I shot up and looked around.

"I'm right here darling." She said walking out of the bathroom and drying her hair. She put the towel down and sat down on the bed next to me. She was wearing a white skirt and a sweater. I let out a breath and laid back down. I saw her smile a little before looking away from me. I interlocked my fingers with hers and squeezed her hand.

"You are one of the strongest girls I know. No, wait strongest person I know." I said.

"No, I'm not." She whispered

"Yes, you are," I said sitting up. "I don't open up about my nightmares like you do so" I sighed "I will now" I whispered. 

"Darling"

"No. I need to share with you" I took a deep breath. "I can barely handle a nightmare. I can't go from having a nightmare to talking about that one the next day...I could even make myself get out of bed the next morning. James had to force me out of bed. You had to get me out of bed and get me food and then help me sleep. You have a nightmare then talk about it then still get out of bed. You show me love and how much you care when in the past when I had nightmares I pushed you away. Some days I treated you like shit."

"But you always apologized for it"

"But you never have to. I both hate and love how you put yourself second. How you put others first. You are really good at it but I know it hurts you. I can see it."

"It really doesn'-"

"When was the last time you bought something for yourself."

"I uh" she paused before shrugging.

"Exactly my point. You have a shit night and still manage to do something good for others...my nightmares were terrible. Always something with my parents. That stupid house. That spell. That r-room" my voice started to break. "Th-those horrible and abusive moments but they are nothing compared to yours. Seeing the people you love and watching them leave over and over and over again. I can't even bare the thought of losing any of you guys and you have to live it every night. That is why you're strong. You manage to keep moving. You keep going and going and I love you for it. I love you for everything. I promise you we will find you a way out of these nightmares and it won't be by listening to them. Ok?"

"Ok" she whispered."thank you"

I smiled at her before cupping her cheeks and kissing her. She kissed back. "Of course love," I said pulling away. "Anything for you"