Memento Mei.
Remember Me.
As I am, not as I was.
Life is challenging enough as it is.
For Skyelle life's challenges go beyond that. Life is a nuisance, a road block to the bittersweet end she desires. Cloaked in an ever present depression stemming...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
(A/N: Not edited. That was the deal I made with my OCD - you get this sooner if I don't edit it lol.
You can thank this earlier than expected and prioritized update on @Mrsharrystyles6 who left the sweetest and most encouraging comment on the last chapter. It motivated me hardcore and made me eager to dive back into the story. I promised her this like three or four days ago though, so - fail on my part.
Also as a little treat to you guys for being so patient - at the end there will be a chain of photos that come directly from my notes. I just wanted you guys to see how fucking crazy my system is. I did redact any info though that might ruin the story for you. What's visible is the stuff already revealed to you guys with a few exceptions like North's 'ghost' segment. That's just a freebie lol.
Tell me what you guys think and please try to overlook the typos. I proofread the first segment once before but not the rest. Feel free to point them out and enjoy!) 🌪
It's been a few days since my meltdown. I'd awoken realizing two very embarrassing things pretty quickly. One, that my room had been cleaned, likely by Marc. So he'd seen firsthand the tantrum I'd thrown. Both of us are pretending it didn't happen. And two, that I'd imagined Gabriel when kissing Antoni. That one was harder to come to terms with.
In all my memories, they'd been protectors, people who took care of me. So why is it I'm fantasizing about kissing one of them? They have to be in their midtwenties by now at least, if they're even alive at all. Owen and Sean, would be closer to thirty now that I think about it. Even if I could know with one hundred percent certainty that they're alive, and admit I might like them in that way, they'd be grown men and I'd just be a kid in their eyes. They'd take one look at me and see a scrawny, moody teenager who acts out when life doesn't go her way. I wouldn't even be close to comparable to the grown mature women who have their shit together, that they could date at the drop of the hat. Why would any of them, let alone Gabriel, want me over what they could have?
Besides, it'd be cruel to even wish for it. I'm dying. I don't get a happy ending in this life. They won't either if I'm in their lives in any capacity.
I spiraled for a few hours beneath the covers of my bed after that daunting realization. It didn't seem to matter how long I stayed under there; in the end, I was just as flabbergasted and confused as before. I had to force myself to leave that for another time. I barely remembered them at that point, so it didn't really matter what conclusion I could come to.
Threading my fingers through my hair, I blow a breath out and tilt my head backward. My eyes shift back and forth as I scan my clothes, trying to pick something out for the day. There's a bit of a problem though - I'm back to thinking about my kiss with Antoni and how I'd imagined one of my childhood caretakers instead.
